New York Notebook

‘British dentistry, is it?’: A trip to an American dentist shattered my confidence

It’s a stereotype that British people have terrible teeth but since I’ve moved to New York I’ve never felt more self-conscious, writes Holly Baxter

Tuesday 09 February 2021 21:30 GMT
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<p>Biting criticism: I returned home less than sure I ever wanted to open my mouth in public again</p>

Biting criticism: I returned home less than sure I ever wanted to open my mouth in public again

National stereotypes usually have a bit of truth at their core, and there’s one painful stereotype about British culture that I’ve had to admit is somewhat accurate while living in the US of A: our notoriously haphazard teeth. Americans take a military approach to their smiles: whitening fluid that’s banned in the EU lines grocery store aisles like peanut butter or orange juice; incisors which look a bit too pointy are shaved down by over-eager dentists; “gum reduction surgery” involving lasers can be procured by an “aesthetic dentist” if you’re showing too much gingiva when you smile; and crooked teeth are a tragedy, not character-building, on the streets of New York.

Like many Brits, I was half-heartedly offered orthodontia when I was a teen, forgot to follow up, then had dentists afterwards shrug and say “They look pretty OK anyway” at subsequent check-ups. Not so the dentists in NYC. No sooner had I opened my mouth here than a dentist put me forward for a referral with an orthodontist at a specialist practice. And no sooner had I followed up for a Covid-friendly orthodontic check-up over digital camera than I was told by the concerned professional at the end: “Oh dear. I see what the problem is here. Hmm, yes. Awful, really… British dentistry, is it?”

A couple of days later, I don’t think I’m quite ready for the Botox, the experimental surgery, the two years of braces or the philtrum reorienting filler

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