Stay ahead of the curve with our weekly guide to the latest trends, fashion, relationships and more Stay ahead of the curve with our weekly guide to the latest trends, fashion, relationships and more
Dating apps have changed the face of dating - but they’ve also given rise to a culture of abuse prompted by rejection.
Because the apps allow for a certain level of anonymity, polite rejections are frequently met with abusive tirades and harassment - a trend that prompted one woman to create an Instagram account dedicated to these interactions.
The Instagram @byefelipe , run by Alexandra Tweten, screenshots these instances and shares them with the account’s more than 425,000 followers.
In addition to entertaining, the immensely popular account also fights back against the men who feel it is okay to lash out on women or send unsolicited genital pictures.
Since @byefelipe was created in 2014, Tweten told ABC Australia that she’s received more than 4,000 submissions from around the world.
She’s also received hundreds of messages from women thanking her for exposing the common harassment.
“The reactions I’ve gotten from a lot of women is them saying: ‘Thank you for creating this and for giving women a voice,’” Tweten said. "Because a lot of the time, women said: 'I didn't know that other women went through this, I thought I was the only one.'
“So it’s kind of a sense of community and just understanding.”
One photo uploaded to the account shows a man Instagram-messaging a woman he saw on Tinder and referring to her as sexy. The woman responded that she was pretty sure she’d swiped left on his Tinder - which incited an abusive response from the man.
“LOL no worries you’re fat and ugly,” he wrote back.
The screenshots, which receive thousands of likes, also prompt hundreds of comments from women who have experienced the same thing.
Show all 30 1 /30Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Ciaran, 24 Brand partnership manager, London. Tinder bio: "'Ideally, I’m looking for dark hair, a red jumper and quite a large face.' It’s a quote from from Nighty Night." Opening line: "I don’t often open the conversation."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Jamie, 29 Production manager, London. Tinder bio: "Tolerant of your beliefs, judgmental of your shoes. Future MILF." Opening line: "They always talk to me first."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Peter, 24 Postgraduate student, Manchester. Tinder bio: "Irish Citizen with a British accent. If you need an EU passport without arousing the suspicions of your Brexit family, I’m your man. Dog ownership a plus. References available upon request." Opening line: "I personalise it each time."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Bex, 20 Student, London. Tinder bio: "My Instagram, my height and my university." Opening line: "A funny GIF"
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Pablo, 34 Head of trading services, London. Tinder bio: "It’s deliberately blank." Opening line: "'Where are you from?' Everybody’s up for answering that."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Max, 26 Project manager, Surrey Tinder bio: "Came in a black Benz, left in a white one." Opening line: "I try and take something from their profile and ask a question based on that. I think it works – I don’t get ghosted too often."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Lauren, 32 Social media consultant, London. Tinder bio: "5’2. Born and raised Londoner. You’ll do." Opening line: "Now, then..." or "You’ll do." If they respond, I’ll ask about their favourite crisps."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 John, 31 Operations director, London. Tinder bio: "Loves dogs, seeing friends, travelling." Opening line: If there’s something interesting in their pictures or bio, I’ll ask about that."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Rebecca, 21 Hospital dispatcher, Exeter. Tinder bio: "Not as grumpy IRL as I look in photos." Opening line: "A sassy GIF of Beyoncé or Honey Boo Boo."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 John, 28 Business consultant, London. What’s your Tinder bio? "Live and work in London."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Imogen, 18 Student, Surrey. Tinder bio: "Happy chap." Opening line: "'Hola!' Often they’ll be like, 'Oh, are you Spanish?' and I’m like, 'No...' It’s worked every time."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Emily, 22 Student, Leeds. Tinder bio: "My old job title and 'University of Leeds'." Opening line: "'I find you a-peel-ing', with banana emojis. It usually goes down well."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 David, 34 Tinder bio: "Midlands boy, living in the big smoke." Opening line: "'Hello :)' It’s worked out so far."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Ellie, 22 Student, London. Tinder bio: "I’d try and woo you with herb and fish jokes, but I don’t know if this is the thyme or the plaice." Opening line: "'I hope you like my chat-up line', then I send a line emoji."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 David, 26 Compliance worker, Bradford. Tinder bio: "My name and my location" Opening line: "Just the typical, 'Hey, how are you?' It tends to work."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Emily, 21 Retail assistant, York. Tinder bio: "What I studied at uni and my Instagram." Opening line: "I try to target something in their pictures, like an interest."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Danny, 23 Student, Nottingham. Tinder bio: "Down to earth guy looking for mates and dates. Love to travel and any excuse to see the world and explore new places." Opening line: "'Hey, how’s you?' Straight to the point."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Charlotte, 21 PR Executive, London. Tinder bio: "I’m a shortie.I hate people who step on escalators slowly. I love the sea." Opening line: "But do you have a puppy?"
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Alison, 20 Student, Manchester. Tinder bio: "Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on the side? To Scan-da-navy-in." Opening line: "A GIF of a woman waving frantically. People reply 90 per cent of the time."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Chris, 25 Corporate investor, London. Tinder bio: "Love the outdoors and dogs. Value laughter, a good Negroni and the simple things in life. Ideally looking for someone to build a fort with in the living room of a Sunday. Let’s grab a drink?" Opening line: "Is there a boyfriend I should be concerned about?"
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Callum, 23 Student, Manchester. Tinder bio: "Student and Shirley-from-EastEnders stunt double." Opening line: "I normally don’t start conversations because of my crippling fear of rejection."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Amy, 24 Marketing assistant, London. Tinder bio: "I don’t have one, but I’ve set my Spotify anthem [on Tinder] to Hall & Oates’ 'You Make My Dreams'." Opening line: "I’m never the first to talk... that’s really bad!"
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Brian, 28 Irish dancer, Tipperary. Tinder bio: "Southern-Irish guy. Dancer in Riverdance and have travelled the world touring. Now teach kids. Primary-school teaching degree with German. Model. Love all sports; athletics, football, tennis. Animal lover – especially dogs!" Opening line: I usually chat about something in their bio.
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Sean, 18 College student, Birmingham. Tinder bio: "I am label-free, gender non-conforming, and a 'one-of-a-kind collectible', a quote from American drag queen Violet Chachki." Opening line: "Kakaw, kakaw, I’m an eagle!"
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Vitaljus, 33 Cabin-crew manager, London. Tinder bio: "I like it simple and honest. Chemistry is all that matters. Terms and conditions apply." Opening line: "How’ve you been?"
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Vincent, 23 Student, Bristol. Tinder bio: "London Boy." Opening line: "Tell me an interesting fact about yourself."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Robyn, 22 Sales assistant, Dundee. Tinder bio? "'Stunner x.' It’s a Dundee thing." Opening line: "I always let them speak first because I think it’s more gentlemanly."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Tom, 23 Brand manager/semi-professional football player, London. Tinder bio: "Just my Instagram." Opening line: "The love-heart-eyes emoji. It works more than 50 per cent of the time."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Susan, 23 Account executive, London. Tinder bio: "Need someone to share pasta with, eating it on your own can get cannelloni sometimes."
Tinder's 30 Most Successful Users 2018 Sandro, 34 Recruiter, London. Tinder bio: "I’m leaving this blank intentionally, so you can judge me entirely on my looks." Opening line: "A Joey Tribbiani GIF."
“Why are men like this?” one person asked.
Another comment praised Tweten for outing the men on Instagram and in her new book, Bye Felipe: Disses, Dick Pics, and Other Delights of Modern Dating
By publicly shaming the behaviour, the hope is that men will realise their words and actions have consequences - or end up on the account.
You can purchase Tweten’s book here .
Join our commenting forum
Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies