Frankie Bridge reveals how paranoia convinced her she had killed her son

Taking her son Parker to get vaccinated earlier than recommended caused singer’s paranoia to kick ‘into overdrive’

Happy family: Frankie and Wayne Bridge with sons Cater and Parker (Frankie Bridge/PA) (Frankie Bridge/PA)

Frankie Bridge has opened up about an incident that made her so paranoid that she believed she had killed her oldest son.

The Saturdays singer wrote about her struggles with mental health and how it impacted her experiences with pregnancy and motherhood in a new book, titled Grow: Motherhood, Mental Health & Me.

In the book, which launched last Thursday, the 32-year-old pop star wrote about taking her son Parker, who is now seven years old, for a chickenpox vaccination before he turned one.

But after her paediatrician told her she should have ideally waited until his first birthday to vaccinate him, Bridge said her mental health “spiralled” as she felt guilt and fear for her son’s health.

“It resulted in a complete meltdown,” she wrote. “My paranoia kicked into overdrive too and I became convinced I had killed my child, before he’d even really got the chance to live.”

Although she was reassured that Parker was in no danger – the vaccine would instead simply be ineffective – Bridge said she felt like a “failure” and that she was a “waste of space, bound to let my kids down”.

According to The Mirror, she also opened up about another time her paranoia made her feel at “crisis”.

Bridge is married to former footballer Wayne Bridge, and they have a second child, Carter, who is six years old.

The couple tied the knot nine months after Parker was born. Bridge said before they were due to travel for their honeymoon, she became worried that she or her husband could die while they were overseas and Parker would have no one to care for him.

“This type of crisis moment is something I had dealt with throughout my life, but I had never been responsible for someone else, and this compounded my paranoia and exacerbated my fears,” she wrote.

She became so concerned that she made Wayne call his lawyer to discuss a plan in the event either of them died while abroad.

Last week, while promoting her new book on ITV’s Lorraine, Bridge admitted she felt “ashamed” of how her body looked when she was pregnant with Parker. She has spoken openly about her struggles with anxiety, depression and an eating disorder.

She told host Christine Lampard that she had “always suffered with controlled eating”, but being unable to control how her body changed during pregnancy was “really difficult” to deal with.

“For the first time I felt so out of control of the way I looked,” she said. “And going up on stage with the rest of the girls [from The Saturdays] I found really difficult, I felt really shamed that I’d lost control of my body, I felt embarrassed of my body and I felt like people were looking at me kind of thinking, ‘what is she doing up on stage? She shouldn’t be there’.”