I was a nine-year-old girl with a period. Why we need to normalise the topic of menstruation in younger people

I remember what it was like to be a child with a period, says Kate Ng, we need to talk more openly about menstruation with younger people not just teenagers

Adults need to be better equipped to talk about menstruation with younger people (Getty Images/iStockphoto)

When I got my period at the age of nine, I didn’t really register what was happening. I saw blood in my pants and just put them in the laundry basket, not thinking anything of it until my mother found them. I had no idea the shift that was happening in my body, I just knew it was kind of weird. But with tears in her eyes, my mum told me how I was a big girl now, a woman, and showed me how to stick an adult-sized pad in my pants.

She relayed this new information with tenderness, but that didn’t stop it from completely altering my childhood as I knew it. I would have to contend with pads that felt like mattresses between my legs for years to come - being from a conservative Christian family meant tampons were completely out of the question, as they were only for “non-virgins”. I didn’t even try to wear a tampon until I was in my 20s.

One day, still aged just nine, I was so sick of the too-large pads that chafed the skin between my thigh and vulva and made me squirm. I thought, what’s the worst that could happen if I didn’t wear one? I bled through my navy school pinafore, much to my embarrassment. I never did that again.

Nowadays, thankfully, there are many more options. From tampon sizes for tweens and teens to reusable period underwear, the improved range and accessibility to period products is a huge and welcome relief.

But there is still work to be done to improve period literacy and education, particularly for young people just starting their first period. What’s already an intensely confusing time is exacerbated by the seismic shift in the body, while many are told this signals a shift into adulthood.

In 2020, a report by period education campaign Betty for Schools found nearly half of women (47 per cent) felt unprepared and didn’t know what to expect when their period started. Nearly a third (32 per cent) admitted to feelings of shame around reaching menarche, their first menstrual cycle.

There’s still the sentiment that children shouldn’t be taught about menstruation, that they don’t need to know about it until they’re a teenager

Terri Harris, Bloody Good Period

According to Terri Harris, reproductive health manager at period equality charity Bloody Good Period, normalising conversations around periods are key to making young people feel comfortable about getting their first one.

“What does having a period mean? It doesn’t necessarily mean you become an adult, but period products are not relatable to children because they’re still advertised in a way that highlights womanhood, femininity and becoming an adult,” she told The Independent.

The UK government promised free period products for all people in secondary schools and colleges in England last December, in a bid to address period poverty and improve access to products. But they’re not freely available to children under the age of 12, despite the age at which a first period arrives creeping steadily downwards.

As well as access to products, there’s also the question of whether adults are equipped to speak to children about menstruation. Conversations around periods can be embarrassing at the best of times - for both parties - and completely absent at the worst of times.

“There’s still the sentiment that children shouldn’t be taught about menstruation, that they don’t need to know about it until they’re a teenager,” said Harris. “But if we normalise conversations about periods from a young age, have more literacy about your body, then they’ll realise that having a period doesn’t make you an adult, it’s just a normal bodily function,” she adds.

It’s not just about having a wide range of period products available so that children have options - if adults don’t have the necessary knowledge and language to have these conversations, children won’t reap the benefits.

[Having] more literacy about your body, then they’ll realise that having a period doesn’t make you an adult, it’s just a normal bodily function

Research by Betty for Schools also found that more than two-thirds of women said lessons they received about periods focused purely on biological aspects and did little to answer practical questions they had about period products. Of that, 73 per cent said they didn’t feel able to ask questions in their lessons about periods.

“A lot of teachers don’t know about the options and products that are now available, and that’s not embarrassing, but if you’re giving them to younger people to offer them choice, they should have informed choice and that means the people teaching about them should be informed,” said Harris. “It’s really important that schools are safe spaces to ask questions. Getting the conversations going are the best way to start”.

Adults, whether it be parents, teachers, or guardians, must be willing to speak openly and positively about menstruation so that younger people can have a better grasp on their bodies.

Menstrual cycles align with so many aspects of our lives; from how we feel to our pain tolerance to indicating if something is wrong that we should seek medical help for. It only makes sense that we start arming our young people with knowledge from the get-go by pursuing spaces where they feel comfortable asking questions and we feel equipped to answer them.