Imago therapy promises to help you reconnect with your partner
Imago therapy promises to help you reconnect with your partner

Imago therapy: The trick that means you’ll never argue with your partner again

A successful relationship isn't about how often you row, but how you do it

Sarah Young
Thursday 10 August 2017 14:55
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All couples fight. From arguing over the children, relatives, money and sex, it’s completely natural to have disagreements with your partner. But if it’s becoming a regular occurrence, it can begin to take its toll.

Enter Imago therapy; a super-rational tool designed to teach couples how to express themselves without the need for inimical conflict, Refinery 29 reports.

Like most forms of couple therapy, the point is to help you reconnect with your partner but where Imago differs is with its logical three-step script that includes mirroring, validation, and empathy.

What’s more, it doesn’t matter whether you’re in a long-term relationship, the early stages of burgeoning love, or simply looking for the best way to avoid confrontation in every day life, Imago is here to help.

So, how does it work?

Under the guidance of a completely impartial therapist, couples begin with the mirroring stage. Here, one person will act as the ‘sender’ and the other one takes up the role of ‘receiver.’

The ‘sender’ is encouraged to talk about their perspective on whatever the issue is, while the ‘receiver’ must listen and repeat back to see if they understood what was being said.

Essentially, the aim is to have a logical conversation without getting angry or upset. It’s all about getting out of your own head and into a more neutral, understanding space.

The next stage, validation, is all about understanding where your partner is coming from, regardless of whether or not you agree with what they’re saying. You simply need to express that you validate their perspective.

The ultimate goal with the final step, empathy, is all about crossing over into your partners world and acknowledging aspects of their life that might contribute to how the feel and behave in the relationship.

It's all about moving on from what can feel like a constant power struggle to a place where you can see where you partner is coming from.

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