7 signs that someone thinks you’re attractive

‘Dilated pupils are a sign of arousal,’ says Dr Susan Marchant-Haycox

Olivia Petter
Tuesday 16 March 2021 18:44
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Flirtation trades in ambiguity. If someone is too obvious in their tactics – perhaps they tell you that your eyes “shine like the sun” - it’s off-putting.

But if they are tacit enough to keep you guessing whether or not they are actually flirting with you, that’s where the fun begins.

With that in mind, it’s not always easy to tell whether someone finds you attractive, or whether they’re simply being friendly.

There are the classic tell-tale signs, such as maintaining eye contact or finding excuses to be physically near you, but there are subtle ones too that you might not have ever even noticed.

We spoke to some psychologists to find out the key signs that someone might be attracted to you.

1. Laughter

How you converse with someone you’re attracted to will differ from how you converse with a friend.

For example, you might find someone laughing at a lot of what you say. That doesn’t necessarily mean you’re very funny, it could just mean they fancy you, notes relationship expert and author Neil Wilkie.

“It’s a sign of the barriers coming down and them being more open to you,” he adds. In other words, it means they find you attractive and want to form a deeper connection with you.

2. Dilated pupils

When a person’s pupils dilate, it can be a sign of many things. One of them, it turns out, is arousal, says psychologist Dr Susan Marchant-Haycox.

“Pupil dilation is a good tell-tale sign of attraction and arousal,” she explains.

“It’s a factor that a person cannot control.”

3. Physical proximity

If someone keeps moving their body to be in close physical proximity to you, it’s a clear sign they are attracted to you, notes Wilkie.

“Perhaps they lean in or touch you gently as you speak.

“If you respond positively to this, the physical connection between the two of you may get even stronger.”

4. Mirroring

The more attracted a person is to you, the more likely they are to mirror their body language to match yours, says Dr Marchant-Haycox.

“It’s a giveaway sign,” she adds, noting that it suggests they want to adapt their body language to fit in with yours.

For example, if you're standing up and leaning on a bar, they may adopt the same exact pose without even realising.

5. Tone of voice

People are more likely to lower their tone of voice when they are attracted to someone, says Dr Marchant-Haycox.

“They will lower the pitch of their voice because they believe it sounds more appealing,” she explains.

6. Touching

While it’s obvious that someone who is attracted to you might be more inclined to be tactile with you, what’s less obvious is that they might be more tactile with themselves, too.

“They often stroke their hair or start twisting longer hair around their fingers when they are with someone they’re attracted too,” says Dr Marchant-Haycox.

“They might also touch their neck or find ways to touch their mouth and lips with the tips of their fingers.”

7. Constant talking

If you are attracted to someone, you don’t want to stop talking to them.

You will be able to tell if someone fancies you by the way they fill every gap of silence, either with a question or a statement notes Dr Marchant-Haycox.

“They will be keen to make sure there is no lull in conversation and thus ensure that there is a mutual exchange of ideas.”

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