overheard

I think Irvine Welsh is a vicarious writer. I mean, he never was a needle junkie for example ... which I was.

Will Self, New Musical Express

As a heterosexual actor ... I am nervous of offending people - because I'm South London heterosexual, and part of my vocabulary is homophobic. That's just the nature of where I live.

Jason Flemyng, who plays a homosexual dancer in Alive and Kicking, London Evening Standard

The National Theatre is an institution of total sleaze and the RSC trivialises and vulgarises Shakespeare in a way that's quite barbarous.

Edward Bond, playwright, lets off steam, Independent

I guess it has been toned down ... I'm just trying to make it as funny as possible, and sometimes things that happen to be funny also happen to offend some people.

Mike Judge, creator of Beavis and Butt-Head, Time Out

When people ask me what Beach Blanket Babylon is, I usually say: "Steve Silver's attention span."

Artistic director Kenny Mazlow on colleague Steve Silver, creator of Beach Blanket Babylon - the longest- running musical review in American history and all-round San Franciscan institution - coming soon to this country, Time Out

I was nervous about the prospect of standing for three hours in an open courtyard. In fact ... we groundlings began to feel a patronising pity for those who'd paid twice or three times as much for the cushioning sterility of a covered seat.

Harry Eyres, on being a groundling in Shakespeare's Globe theatre, Spectator

Do you think Di might do? Fergie's a possibility - if the story line is right.

David Hasselhoff discusses future casting for Baywatch, Radio Times

Forget all that stuff about providing for underprivileged areas of the community for a while ... It's the fans I worry about, not UB40 holders who couldn't care less anyway.

Rupert Christiansen, critic, in a open letter to Mary Allen, the Royal Opera House's new chief executive, Spectator

When Joanna Lumley stayed on her desert island, she managed to turn a bra into a pair of cave-slippers. So Dawn gave me one of her bras in case I needed an emergency hammock.

Lenny Henry discloses the secrets of his trip to the Amazon, Radio Times

I'll pinch Tony Blair's if he ever walks past me.

Spice Girl Geri on the Prime Ministerial bottom, Radio Times

The Seventies? It was a golden period. Now with the studios, it's all hard- ware and special effects, comic books and stunts.

Faye Dunaway, actress, on Seventies cinema, Guardian

Even back in the days when the John Peel Roadshow was about you'd get people who'd just stand there and watch you - I wasn't even mixing - and I'd say to them, "Look, I don't do anything, you know, except stand here looking pissed and pissed off, then at the end of the evening I walk out with my pockets bulging with your money. Stand and watch me if you want but you won't get much out of it."

John Peel, New Musical Express