What do you call your loved one?

OPINIONS

TERRY MAJOR BALL, author and John Major's brother: I frequently call my wife John. She'll let it go on for a little while and then she'll point out that she's Shirley. I tend to be a bit absent-minded and sometimes call people by their wrong names, it's just one of those things with me. I don't know whether I'm a scatter brain or what. I call Shirley "Shirl" - it's not so much a pet name as laziness.

CYNTHIA LENNON, singer and author: My pet name for my partner, Jim Christie, is The Third Man. He loves the film, and also John was the first man, Julian the second, and Jim is the third man in my life. Jim calls me "scapus cum bulbo", which is Latin for antique lily.

BILL BEAUMONT, former Rugby player: I call my wife Hilary "love" - very romantic. And she calls me plonker.

JILLY COOPER, novelist: I'm afraid Leo and I are so trite - it's always been "Bear" and "Bear". It sounds so twee. We were on honeymoon in Norfolk and there was a huge sign up which said "Bear left for Norwich". Leo had a vision of this bear leaving for Norwich and that's where it came from.

LORD OAKSEY, racing commentator and columnist: I call my wife Chicky. Her sister Carolyn was called Hen at school and so my wife, who ought to be called Rachel, was called Chicky, being a young hen. The poor thing has been lumbered with the name ever since. Chicky hasn't got a pet name for me. I answer to any loud cry.

ANNABEL BOWERS, florist: I call my loved one Hon, short for honey and for all sorts of sentimental reasons. He calls me Smelly - nice smelly though, it's because he likes my perfume. The names Rover and Mabel are interesting, different - I will look at John Major in a new light now.

PATRICK MORE, surveyor: I call my wife Weed or Miss Symptom as she's a hypochondriac. She calls me Mr Gibbon because I like dancing around pretending to be an ape.

BEVERLEY KENN, kennel maid: Squidgy Legs is a good pet name. Sometimes a man will have nice legs and you just want to squeeze them. I don't like John Major's pet name Rover at all - I think it's a bit insulting to dogs.

MIKE DIXON, double glazing salesman: I'm American, with an English wife who I met sailing in Hawaii. I call her Pleg - poor little English girl. Little English girls travelling around America do a lot of flirting and eyelash fluttering. American men love it - they go "Oh, say something in English and I'll do anything you want". She calls me Hefferlump because I am a bit of a lump, I guess. English girls often call their boyfriends hefferlump, like German girls call their boyfriends honig kuchen pferd - honey horse-cake.

MIRANDA JESSOP, secretary: I call my boyfriend Little Ted because he's part Maori and the colour of a teddy bear. He calls me Olive because I look like Popeye's girlfriend Olive Oyl.

VICTORIA MARTIN, stockbroker: My partner calls me Petal. I call him Sugarbottom, though he doesn't like me calling him that in company.