Woman applauded for demanding parents get noses pierced before they can see granddaughter again

‘They violated your trust in a huuuuuge way,’ one Reddit reader writes

Kaleigh Werner
New York
Wednesday 13 March 2024 15:38 GMT
Parental leave reforms

A woman has been applauded for the non-negotiable demand she gave her parents.

Taking to the popular Reddit forum, Am I The A**hole, the mother of one explained how she told her mom and dad they needed to get their noses pierced before they could see their granddaughter again. She then offered background information on her family, revealing that her parents brought her young daughter to get her ears pierced without the permission of her or her husband.

“My husband and I travel down to Mexico to visit with my family. I am an American citizen, my mom and dad are not,” she explained.

According to the Reddit user, her mom and dad bought her daughter earrings for her birthday. However, because her one year old doesn’t have her ears pierced, she politely told them she’d save the jewellery for when “she was old enough to get her ears pierced”.

“We left my daughter with my parents while we went to meet up with some friends,” the original poster continued. “When we went to pick up my daughter, my mom showed us that we didn’t need to wait because they had taken her to get her ears pierced.”

According to the post, both the Redditor and her husband were so upset. Her partner suggested that the grandparents were no longer allowed to spend time with their granddaughter alone. But that wasn’t enough of a punishment in the Reddit user’s opinion.

“I said that I would not be bringing her, or any other kids we might have, down here to see my parents. We checked out three days early and went home,” she confessed.

Frustrated by her parents’ actions, she didn’t speak to them for a few days and ignored their calls. Then, once she returned and settled in Phoenix, Arizona, she reached out to her mom and dad.

She proclaimed: “I finally called them. I asked them not to speak until I was done talking. I told them that my husband and I are upset with them for getting our baby’s ears pierced without our permission. I told them that we went back home and probably wouldn’t be visiting for a while.”

“They said that my sister and I both had pierced ears when we were babies and that it did not harm us,” she continued. “I said that we were not going to change our minds. They started getting everyone including my grandmother to call me and say I was being ridiculous.”

After some time, both the Reddit user and her husband devised a compromise. The pair agreed to continue to visit, but the grandparents wouldn’t be allowed time with their grandchild alone. Additionally, the Redditor’s mom and dad had to get their noses pierced.

She noted: “They said that we are being stupid and that they are not going to do that. I said no problem and hung up. We have started blocking anyone who tries to call us and give us shit for denying my parents their RIGHT to see my daughter.”

Readers flooded the comment section of her post, sharing their candid impressions of the situation. The majority agreed that the Reddit poster was not the “bad guy” for demanding her parents get their own piercings, especially because they broke her trust.

One person said: “NTA! They violated your trust in a huuuuuge way, and they have absolutely no right to see your daughter, nor do they have a right to see you. They’re confusing rights with wants.”

“I came from a country where it is almost traditional to give babies piercings before their first birthdays and I still think OP’s parents are still AHs for doing it behind the baby’s parents backs. NTA,” another individual wrote.

Someone else remarked: “I read your ‘ultimatum’ as more tongue-in-cheek. Not that you’re actually expecting them to get their noses pierced but that you’re simply enforcing a NC boundary (knowing that they’re obviously not getting themselves pierced). I think that’s fine and fair.”

One Redditor disagreed: “Though as much as petty responses make for some good Reddit drama, it’s not the best way to go here.”

“Yeah it is a strategic mistake to ask for something you don’t really want because you think the other person won’t comply,” another added.

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