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‘Common events can turn into really scary situations for women in a snap’: Twitter thread about everyday fears goes viral

'Men, if you want to be allies, then recognising that assault is bad is just the minimum'

Olivia Petter
Tuesday 09 October 2018 12:01 BST
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(Getty Images)

A Twitter thread detailing one woman’s experience trying to sell something online only to be propositioned by the prospective buyer in her home, has gone viral.

In the thread, which has been shared more than 113,000 times, Sara Suze recalls how she had attempted to sell the item via a classified ad and was later propositioned by the buyer when he arrived at her home.

Now, thousands of people chiming in to tell similar stories after Suze explained how her experience perfectly illustrates how common events “can turn into really scary situations for women in a snap”.

After listing the item on the selling app Letgo, Suze says she had arranged for the buyer to come to her home to collect it at a time when her husband would be there.

However, the buyer turned out to be a man who worked during the nights and could only make the collection in the morning.

“I said yes as long as you're here before my husband leaves for work,” Suze recalls.

He arrived 15 minutes late, by which point Suze’s husband had already left and she had sent the buyer a message asking him not to come.

After telling him to come back later, the buyer asks if he can have a quick look at the dryer before returning.

“So, now I have a decision to make,” Suze writes, explaining how she went on to make an assessment of any potential threats this man may pose by making judgements on his age, his build and the way he’s interacted with her thus far (“Hasn't smiled at me strangely or looked at me for too long”).

“Feeling like he's more likely to be safe than unsafe, and feeling badly about not letting him see the dryer, I invite him in [sic].”

The two proceeded to carry the heavy dryer out of the basement and up the stairs.

“He's staring at me, hard. Right in the eyes, sly smile on his lips. My hair is matted to my forehead. I can't get a comfortable grip. I'm just about to ask him what's going on - is he even lifting? - when he starts to speak.

"’Damn, girl. Look at you. Man, those thighs. Put em to work, huh? That sweat looks good on you. Workin' thighs like that, I bet your husband is a happy man. C'mon, show me what you got.’ I was mortified. And I'm realising I can't get out.

“He and a dryer I'm lifting are blocking me.”

She brushed off his comments by laughing and soon rushed off to call her husband, the buyer then left without making a purchase

Suze used the anecdote as an example of the everyday fears women face and explained that events like this take an “emotional toll”.

“So men, if you want to be allies, then recognising that assault is bad is just the minimum,” she concludes.

“For every sexual assault, there are thousands of events that don't lead to violence but which scare the s*** out of us, especially after our "assessment" turns out to have been wrong.”

Her story has been widely shared online, with many women responding with similar anecdotes.

“Women have to make concessions ALL THE TIME,” wrote one person.

Another added how the threat of incidents such as these impact the choices she makes on a daily basis: “This makes it hard for me to have a repair man over when I’m alone.

“This makes me request female masseuses.

“This makes me cross to the other side of the street if someone’s behind me and lie about someone else being home when something is delivered.”

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