Bluffers Briefing: Naomi Campbell

Who she? Where's your planet? She's the million- pound-a-year, five foot 10 inches megamodel (23) from sarf London who announced live on Irish TV this weekend that she was going to marry Adam Clayton of U2, of course.

Is there a precedent for such a liaison? Yasmin and Simon Le Bon. Patty Boyd and George Harrison and Eric Clapton. Jerry Hall and Bryan Ferry and Mick Jagger. Christy Brinkley and Billy Joel. Iman and David Bowie. Naomi Campbell and Eric Clapton.

Why do supermodels mate with rock stars? Why do fish mate with fish?

Who has sucked Naomi Campbell's toe? Madonna, for her book, Sex.

Who used to, but doesn't any more? Robert de Niro, Mike Tyson, Eddie Murphy.

The Naomi Diet? McDonald's, sushi, bacon and eggs, strawberry Bellinis.

What do they say about her: 'The Black Bardot' (Karl Lagerfeld, fashion designer). 'No Einstein' (Michael Roberts, fashion photographer).

What does she need? 'A relationship with someone who is nice and forget about running around with famous men.' (Grace Coddington, fashion director, American Vogue).

What should Mr Clayton worry about? Ms Campbell wants to be a rock star too.

(Photograph omitted)