Man wrong to think kisses in estranged wife’s texts were ‘flirtatious’, judge rules

Family Court judge says woman's text kisses were not proof former husband was not abusing her

Emma Snaith
Sunday 13 January 2019 19:29 GMT
The couple, who remain anonymous, are in the middle of a Family Court dispute involving their child [stock]
The couple, who remain anonymous, are in the middle of a Family Court dispute involving their child [stock]

A woman who ended text messages with a kiss was not being "flirtatious" with her estranged husband, a judge has ruled.

The couple, who remain anonymous, are in the middle of a Family Court dispute involving their child.

Judge Farooq Ahmed had been asked to make "findings of fact" after the woman accused the man of abusing her.

The man, who denied the allegations, told Judge Ahmed that the woman "repeatedly" signed off her text messages to him with an "x", signalling a kiss.

He argued that the text kisses were "flirtatious" and that the woman would not have sent them if she had really regarded him as an abuser.

But Judge Ahmed disagreed and said that a kiss was "just her way of signing off".

The details of the argument emerged after they were published by Judge Ahmed, who hears private family cases in Kent and Sussex.

He wrote: "The father relies upon numerous text messages ... in which the mother repeatedly signs off with a kiss.

"He regards this as flirtatious and not something that she would have done had she really regarded him as an abuser.

The judge also found that the man raped his partner "on numerous occasions" throughout their relationship.

The child at the centre of the dispute was conceived in one such attack.

Judge Ahmed condemned the father's behaviour as inviolving "acts of exceptional cruelty".

"From about July 2016, the father carried out a campaign to assault, emotionally harm and frighten the mother, including by assault carried out by himself or by instructing another, throwing sausages containing razor blades over the fence so that her dog would be seriously injured and by killing her cat and leaving its dead body on her doorstep," he said.

On 5 March 2018 the woman was seriously injured, after the man hired an assailant to attack her.

"I find that the mother was not being flirtatious. It was just her way of signing off," the judge said, when considering her text messages.

"The father is wrong to read anything into it."

Judge Ahmed did not identify anyone involved.

His ruling comes ahead of the publication of the government's draft Domestic Abuse Bill which is to include new domestic abuse protection notices and orders,

The bill will also lead to the creation a Domestic Abuse Commissioner responsible for monitoring services, raising awareness and making recommendations to authorities.

Additional reporting by PA

Thank you for registering

Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged inPlease refresh your browser to be logged in