Campaigner whose sons were murdered by her abusive ex-husband made MBE

‘I give a voice to the people who can’t speak up because they are frightened whose strength is taken away,’ says Claire Throssell

Ms Throsell has campaigned for the government to urgently overhaul laws around child custody (Claire Throssell)

A campaigner whose sons were murdered by her abusive ex-husband has spoken of her delight after she discovered she was being made an MBE for campaigning on domestic abuse.

Claire Throssell’s two young sons, Jack and Paul, were killed in a fire their father Darren Sykes started in their family home back in October 2014 after the family courts granted him unsupervised access.

Ms Throssell, who lives in South Yorkshire, told The Independent she was both thrilled and surprised to have been recognised.

The 48-year-old added: “It’s an honour. When I accept this it will be for Jack and Paul too. At the heart of it all is Jack and Paul and all the other children who were murdered by known domestic abuse perpetrators.

“Other than my sons, these children remain anonymous names and symbols on serious case reviews. I made a promise six years ago when they died and I held them in my arms that I wouldn’t let any other children be murdered by domestic abusers.

“I was absolutely gobsmacked they gave me the award. I give a voice to the people who can’t speak up because they are frightened whose strength is taken away. Domestic abuse is an uncomfortable subject but it is a silent killer. Women and children are being murdered at the hands of domestic abusers.”

Ms Throsell, who has campaigned for the government to reform laws around child custody, said she had missed her sons over Christmas and had gone to visit them in the cemetery where they are buried.

“One day I want to put a hand on their stone and say we’ve done it in your name,” she added.

“To wake up on Christmas morning is sheer torture. It is always a battle every day to exist. My mind says there is so much work to do here. But my heart and soul is with the boys. As a mum, I want to be with them.”

The campaigner thanked people in her local community for helping her rebuild the house her sons died in and “picking” her up every time the domestic abuse bill stalled.

Ms Throssell heaped praise the landmark legislation, which is set to return to the House of Lords for its second reading on 5 January, will acknowledge children as being victims in situations of domestic abuse.

Speaking to The Independent in November, Ms Throssell urged the government to urgently overhaul laws around child custody to ensure there are no more preventable child deaths as a result of unsafe child contact with a domestic abuser.

She told of how she had initially encouraged her sons Jack and Paul to spend time with their father after they broke up but the sons decided they did not want to see him after months of hearings.

But the courts ruled her abusive ex-husband, who also died in the fire, would be allowed to have five hours’ of unsupervised contact with his sons each week despite her evidence he had previously threatened to kill them and himself.

Ms Throssell said she had wanted her former husband to have only supervised contact with their children due to him having perpetrated a lengthy campaign of physical and psychological abuse against her during their 16-year marriage.

She noted the stalking and intimidation she endured during their relationship continued after she left him – with him sending messages to her family and slashing her car tyres.

London’s victims commissioner previously told The Independent family courts are responsible for “state-sanctioned abuse” of domestic abuse victims as they allow violent parents to torment their ex-partners through the legal process. Claire Waxman said the family courts have emboldened domestic abusers to “continue cycles of abuse, including control, unwanted contact and harassment”.

A 2016 study by Women’s Aid revealed the cases of 19 children in 12 families who were all intentionally killed by a parent who was also a known perpetrator of domestic abuse. All of the perpetrators were male and fathers to the children they killed.

The perpetrators all had access to their children via formal or informal child contact arrangements – with more than half of the custody provisions having been ordered through the courts.