Singular lives: The lads who grew up to be lonely men

The Loaded generation has grown up and given rise to a new social grouping: men who are single, middle-aged and lonely. And now they're under attack by the green lobby and health watchdogs. Report by Guy Adams

It's the final insult to the Loaded generation. A decade after their lager-swilling heyday, the New Lads of the 1990s have turned-into male versions of Britain's most infamous singleton, Bridget Jones.

Research published yesterday identified a new social class: the "regretful loner." They are men aged between 35 and 45, who live alone, and have either failed to settle down, or are the victims of failed relationships and separated families.

If their apparent status as social pariah wasn't bad enough, the RL's have also become the latest bête noire of the environmental lobby. A study published by University College London (UCL) blames John Prescott's plan to concrete much of rural England on the rise of solo living.

Combined with the group's increasing affluence - RL's are the biggest consumers of land, energy, and household appliances in England and Wales - academics believe that the unchecked growth of this social class is on the verge of causing a consumption crisis.

Things don't look rosy on the personal front, either: the growing generation of ageing single men also stands accused of putting a critical strain on Britain's healthcare services.

A second batch of research, also published yesterday showed that one in five single men fail to tell anyone - even their doctors - about their health problems. For men in a stable relationship, the figure falls to 7 per cent.

"Women tend to talk a lot more openly to their friends about health and well-being issues, whereas our research shows that men are more private," says Dr Chris Dark, of the medical insurer PruHealth.

"Whilst it is understandable that not every man will want to divulge their personal details with friends and colleagues it is extremely worrying to discover that nearly one in 10 don't want to talk to anyone at all, not even their doctor.

"Single men are most at risk [of falling seriously ill] because they do not have a partner to talk to. Encouraging them to open up may not be an easy task, but it is up to everyone to persuade their loved ones to do so."

As a result, men who live alone double their risk of heart disease. Last month's Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health discovered that the two strongest indicators for severe angina, heart attacks, or sudden death, were age and living alone.

The rise of the Regretful Loner appears to be rooted in the the growth in divorce and family break-up throughout the 1980s and 1990s. Whitehall projections now suggest that 150,000 extra people in Britain each year are choosing to live alone.

As a result, as many as five million extra homes will have to be built in Britain over the next 20 years. In southern England alone, 200,0000 new homes will need to be built each year, many in suburban and rural areas.

Academics are currently exploring new ways for Britain to cope with the change in living habits. Dr Jo Williams, of UCL's Bartlett School of Planning, says that one-person households consume 38 per cent more products, 42 per cent more packaging, 55 per cent more electricity and 61 per cent more gas than their paired-up contemporaries.

"The rise in younger, one person households is having an increasingly serious impact on the environment, but we have identified possible opportunities which arise from the group's expansion and diversification.

"There is real opportunity to house this group in ecological new-builds that are prestigious, well-designed, state-of-the-art, and environmentally sound."

"Regretful Loners who are forced into living alone by circumstances create demand for more collaborative lifestyles, such as more widespread co-housing schemes, where you have a private space such as a bedroom, bathroom and kitchen, but share some living and storage areas."

The RL's may take a bit of persuading, though. They frequently cite "freedom" as a reason for staying single, and are entitled to bristle at being instructed how and where to live their lives.

"I'm quite happy living alone, and I'm certainly not a regretful loner," says Simon Beckett, a 32-year-old business publishing editor, who lives in a one-bedroom flat in Wanstead, east London. "My marital status is hopeful. I haven't been in a relationship for a while, but I'm certainly not averse to the odd date.

"There's a time and a place for living with other people, and its called university. Once you earn a few quid, you can afford the personal space. As to the environment, I'd happily share my supposed burden with the right person, but there's plenty of time for me to find her.

"I have all the trappings of the single male lifestyle: the Sky Plus, DVD, X-Box and a widescreen TV, but I do my bit for the environment. I don't drive, and I try not to create waste in the first place by buying products with minimal packaging, and finding charities to take on my old electrical equipment.

"And, unlike married people, I don't have kids to splurge vast amounts of money and resources on. In fact, I would say that living in a small flat like mine ought to mark me, and others like me, out as environmentally responsible."

Either way, it's not as if the single male isn't already the victim of some institutionalised persecution from corporate Britain. The Association of British Insurers (ABI) says insurance firms routinely charge single males more than any other social group.

"Statistics show that people in stable relationships make fewer claims," says a spokesman. "It's all related to claims statistics because insurers will base premiums on the levels of risk someone represents."

The absence of a wife or long-term girlfriend can add as much as 10 per cent to the average motoring premium.

"We're interested in facts, and the facts show there are lots of different factors that come into play, for example type of car, where you live," adds the ABI. "If you are in a relationship or not, it will be part of the level of risk."

Elsewhere, the rise of the Regretful Loner, and consequent absence of willing fathers, is one of several factors blamed for Britain's escalating sperm crisis. Reports at the weekend revealed that thousands of women seeking fertility treatment faced remaining childless because fertility clinics could not keep pace with the demand for sperm.

Earlier this year, the Government decided to allow single women in their thirties and forties to have free fertility treatment on the NHS, as record numbers were forced into opting for motherhood without a man.

At the time, women left childless were given an equally unflattering tag: SadFabs, which stands for "single and desperate for a baby."

The Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority had earlier helped pave the way for the changes by removing the requirement for potential female donors to have a "father figure" for their child.

Not surprisingly, the "RL" label is widely rejected by the men to whom it is supposedly applied. Far from representing a failure to find a willing mate, the majority of RL's see their single status as a lifestyle choice.

For many, it's also a trendy way of life. One of our most famous living RL's, the eternal bachelor Hugh Grant, helped cement the single male's status as "cool" icon in the 2002 film About a Boy.

In it, he plays the raffish and impeccably turned-out Will Freeman, a 30-something man of leisure whose lifestyle and Clerkenwell flat is a virtual embodiment of minimalist chic.

The writer Nick Hornby - whose 1998 novel inspired the film - leapt to the defence of the maligned breed of males upon whom his protagonist was based.

"One of the things that I was trying to do with that book was to write about someone who was not a 'regretful' loner, but who did it because it was the easiest and healthiest, and most comfortable way to live.

"There's an awful lot of pressure on men to settle down. Maturity is always equated with family life, and this is another example of people thinking that a man cannot possibly be complete without children, and if he is, is treated with a degree of suspicion."

For Hornby, as for many of Britain's breed of Regretful Loners, the unhappily single man is far less of a social danger than the unhappily married-with-kids.

"There's a line in the book when Will is being told that he's immature and selfish, and says why am I being selfish, if its only me? There's a possibility with a lot of these sort that they would go on being selfish within the confines of a family, and that, surely, is even worse."

Additional reporting by Stephen Habberley and Karen Yossman

Alone again or...

Daniel Maier: 37, Comedian

"I've lived alone since I left university 16 years ago, interrupted only by two periods of co-habitation.

"I do have a nesting instinct these days: I recently got a cat and piano and started buying fresh flowers, but when people came round to visit they would assume I was gay."

"If someone could find me a wife, I'd happily alleviate the housing shortage, but right now my singledom is just the way things have worked out.

"I take my health seriously, though: I even save up seven or eight ailments before I bother my doctor with an appointment."

Iain Black: 42, Design Consultant

"In my case, living together was increasingly stressful for both parties. I was taking the stress of work home increasing the stress at home and then taking that stress back into work.

"Some singletons in my age group find the work-hard play-hard culture difficult to break out of. In my case, however, I've earned enough to buy a decent flat, which has good energy efficiency with double glazing and new heating system.

"As I get older, I am becoming more environmentally aware, and having built up my career and business I can work from home, which means that I don't need to use my car for commuting."

Ed Reeve: 34, Photographer

"Micha and I have been together for two years, but we both travel a lot for our jobs, so haven't yet been able to settle down.

"I would like children in the future, but I'm not in any kind of rush. I've got a career, and a life to live. Settling down is always on one's mind, but it's not a pressing priority.

"I am currently building my own home. It's a contemporary cube, designed by David Adjaye, and has three bedrooms.

"But it will all be made of wood and is sustainable. I've used hemp for insulation, and its got solar panels. So where I can be, I'm actively environmentally friendly."

Tom Walker: 36, Software Developer

"I've been single for much of the past 36 years, and haven't managed to sustain a relationship much beyond the one year mark. It's been a partly a matter of choice, partly never meeting the right person."

"I used to feel anxiety about finding the right partner. But the older I get, the less I seem to care. These days, I'm more likely to feel anxiety about not having enough anxiety, if that makes sense."

"If we weren't taking up properties, some other social sector would be. You can't criticise us for wanting the best place we can afford. If you try to get a flatshare, you just end up with nutters."

David Macmillan: 38. Corporate Financier

"I can't stress how easy it is to remain single.

"Being a New Zealander, it's also always in the back of my mind that I might return home in a year or two, and I wouldn't want to get into a relationship where I'd then be in a position where I might break someone's heart.

"Does it have advantages? Well, I'm not answerable to the opposite sex. I have time on my hands, and I'm never hampered by another person.

"It can also be a lonely existence, though, especially when most of your friends are either married with children, or in long-term relationships."