Things ain't what they used to be: CARTIER POLO

7 JULY

How it was

One of the world's most ancient sports (it dates back to 650BC), polo is the ne plus autre of posh pastimes. The jewel in the sport's crown is The Cartier International, held on Smith's Lawn at the Guards Club in Windsor Great Park. The Queen regularly makes the short journey from Windsor to the Royal Box to watch a few chukkas.

How it is

The royal connection is still important, but today's punters are more likely to see a pissed Prince Harry surrounded by soap stars and Eurotrash. The Cartier tent is top place to be seen (and knock back obscene quantities of champagne), but a village of rival corporate tents has also sprung up.

"Polo has become much more of a parvenu sport," says one member of the old guard. "Toffs understand it, but the more meritocratic individual will come along and say, 'what's this pile of crap – show me the champagne'."

"Ludicrous financiers now pay to have their own teams and insist on playing, which is like Mohamed al-Fayed turning out in midfield for Fulham. It's a subsidised joke."

"That's rather cruel," says the Guards Club's Charles Stisted. "You have to be relatively wealthy to have a team, but the event has settled down and become less corporate."

Vital Statistics

There are 15,000 grandstand seats. At least 4,000 are sold to corporate hospitality, including 3,000 to the nightclub, Chinawhite. Tickets cost from £35 to £60. Entry for a car costs £15; £120 for a limousine. Access to the uber-posh Smith's Lawn Enclosure is restricted to Guards Club members. Dress code: smart casual.