Quotes Of The Week: Sport

I have dedicated this fight to the greatness of womanhood and that is why I have invited Margaret Thatcher, Mo Mowlam, Hilary Clinton and the president of Ireland to come ringside with me.

Don King on Mike Tyson's fight against Francois Botha in Las Vegas tonight.

I may be crass and obnoxious but that's my way. But I realise you have got to kiss ass before you can kick it.

Tyson.

I think they enjoyed my team talk for once. One or two of them probably had a sleep.

Alex Ferguson, Manchester United manager, on the power cut at Old Trafford before last Sunday's win over West Ham.

I don't like the foreign lads coming in and moaning, `the league's too long' or they need more days off or they're returning home. They should respect the English game.

Paul Gascoigne.

DNA tests would prove that the side is mine.

Ruud Gullit, former Chelsea manager, on his old team.

It's obvious that Ruud Gullit does not want me here. He has not spoken to me at all - but then he doesn't speak to anyone much.

Dietmar Hamann, unsettled Newcastle midfielder.

If there is an apology it must be coming by horseback.

Arsene Wenger, Arsenal manager, explaining the delay in receiving an

apology from Ferguson for his comments about Arsenal "liking a scrap".

I didn't help myself by discovering drink and women. It was like opening Pandora's Box.

Jim Rodwell, Rushden defender, on why he missed out on a League career.

It's the kind of place where you can hear a pin drop. You can even hear the people eating their crisps.

Rodwell contemplates a match at Slough after playing before 40,000 in the FA Cup at Leeds.

One cannot be sure that the members did not avail themselves of our local ladies.

Bruce Baird, former New South Wales Olympics minister, on bribery allegations involving IOC officials.

Thanks very much. See you next year.

Tuareg bandit leader after robbing competitors in the Dakar Rally.