The Sweeper: The price is right

BLACKBURN AND Milan, shame on both your crumbling, talent-free houses. Fancy not being able to score against Liverpool's so-called defence and losing 4-0 in a frankly insulting manner to Parma respectively last week. Not that Sweeper's bitter about losing his money. He's not. At all.

This afternoon, exciting new-look Leeds and title-chasing nose-bleeders West Ham might draw 2-2, with Jimmy Hasselbaink or Ian Wright scoring first. It'll be such an action-packed scrum of a bunfight, who can really tell? Duncan Disorderly Ferguson must be fancied to draw first blood for Ruud's boys at the Riverside tomorrow in what should also be a goalfest - perhaps another 2-2 - while in Italy, Juventus must surely rouse themselves to beat Lazio, perhaps 2-0. Filippo Inzaghi might score first. If only Sheffield Wednesday's Paolo Di Canio weren't suspended, he'd be backable to hit something first (maybe even the net) against Forest on Monday, but as he's out, Andy Booth is preferred to do the honours. The Owls should shade this no-hopers' night out.

SATURDAY LIBERO WAGERS

(10 x 50p trebles with Ladbrokes): Aston Villa to draw with Manchester (11-5); Blackburn to draw with Charlton (12-5); Derby to draw with Arsenal (12-5); Everton to draw with Chelsea (9-4); Tottenham to draw with Liverpool (11-5).

Leeds v West Ham

First goalscorer/correct score doubles: Jimmy Hasselbaink/2-2 draw (50p at 60-1, Stanley). Ian Wright/2-2 draw (50p at 66-1, Stanley).

SUNDAY SKY MATCH

Middlesbrough v Newcastle

Score: 2-2 (pounds 1 at 14-1, generally).

First goal: Ferguson (pounds 1 at 6-1, Ladbrokes).

SUNDAY C4 ITALIAN JOB

Juventus v Lazio

Score: 2-0 (pounds 1 at 15-2, Tote).

First goal: Inzaghi (pounds 1 at 5-1, generally).

MONDAY SKY MATCH

Sheff Wed v Nottm Forest

Score: 2-1 (pounds 1 at 7-1, generally).

First goal: Andy Booth (pounds 1 at 5-1, generally).

ORIGINAL BANK: pounds 100.

CURRENT KITTY: pounds 64.44.

TODAY'S BETS: pounds 13.08 (inc pounds 1.08 tax).

SWEEPER'S STABS IN THE DARK