THIS talk of opening the Royal Yacht Britannia to the public won't go down well with the 270 ratings and officers of the Royal Yacht Service who pad barefooted across its decks so that the monarch and her guests are not disturbed by footsteps on the teak planking. They are a very protective mob.
On my last visit to Britannia, in the Pool of London, a few years back, I asked to go to the lavatory, although being afloat I used the correct nautical term. My officer escort said no. If I wanted to relieve myself he would call up a launch to take me ashore and have it wait to bring me back. He seemed to think that a commoner in the royal loo was lese-majeste.
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