The Sketch: If we went to war over WMD, why are they now a low priority?

It was the Prime Minister's first appearance since the break to confront his massed enemies. These are many, despite his sincerity, his passionate convictions, his humanitarian concerns.

For 10 days, the media had been disseminating very damaging accusations. Ex-ministers were calling him a liar. The security services were leaking tales of evil. The left of his party was threatening rebellion; the Tories had signalled the end of their co-operation; the Liberal Democrats were dancing round in circles ringing the bells on their caps.

How could he survive? By slaughtering everything in sight, that's how. By trampling the hapless turnip-head on the opposite bench into mash. By spearing this accusation, by charming that critic, by letting off bursts of sincerity that were so radioactive nothing exposed to them was left standing.

It was the most depressing thing I've ever seen. And the most exhilarating. You didn't have to believe a word he was saying to be swept along with it. It was a display of sheer power.

The fellow that leads off for the Tories began with John Reid, the PM's agent, who had been criticising the security services for their "rogue elements". So who were they, and how many were there? The Prime Minister said, with exquisite timing: "Who are they? I don't know. They are anonymous." The promised Labour rebellion went up in one shout of laughter. He went on to say absolutely unequivocally: "There was no attempt whatsoever in Downing Street to override the Joint Chiefs of Staff."

"The Prime Minister is equivocating," Old Turnip Head said and then the great gales of laughter extinguished everything else he had to say. All we could interpret were his hands. He wasn't waving, he was drowning. Mash doesn't float, you see.

Charles Kennedy said Mr Blair was asking the public for a little patience, for a little time to find the WMD. But this was exactly the appeal the UN weapons inspector had made before the war. The courtesy was denied him - why should it be extended to the PM?

Mr Blair said the priority was reconstruction. Humanitarian aid. Rebuilding Iraq. WMD could now wait. This is a very revealing answer, when you consider what it conceals. An unknown Labour backbencher and Menzies Campbell both made the same point. If we went to war to prevent WMD falling into terrorists' hands - wasn't now the single most likely time for that to happen? How can finding them suddenly be a low priority? Alex Salmond wondered why the PM couldn't admit that our security service documents purporting to show Iraq acquiring nuclear materials from Africa were crude forgeries. Mr Blair said: "I don't accept what he says." Some of the forgeries had the signature of an official who'd retired eight years ago: if Mr Blair refuses to admit that what would he admit? For all his victory, and with the best will in the world, it would be mad to believe Mr Blair. Why? Because, foremost among his many abilities, the man can tie a reef knot with the two ends of his tongue.

Simoncarr75@hotmail.com