Big foot

They're great at defending free kicks and unstoppable going forward. It's every manager's dream, but unfortunately these footballers are unlikely to get Fifa accreditation. Yesterday 10 elephants played a Thai prison team in a game devised by prison authorities as a diversion to stop inmates betting on Euro 2004. Sounds a perverse strategy to us. Wouldn't it be more fun to bet on whether your cell mate is going to get crushed by Jumbo rather than a match in faraway Portugal? We'd also like to know whether the prospective Thai owners of Liverpool FC are thinking of bringing some big-eared pals over to Anfield for a pre-season training match. As for those prisoners, they can get back to the betting today, as Wayne Rooney and Co take on Croatia. Let's hope that England's own baby elephant has something to blow his trumpet about by the final whistle.

They're great at defending free kicks and unstoppable going forward. It's every manager's dream, but unfortunately these footballers are unlikely to get Fifa accreditation. Yesterday 10 elephants played a Thai prison team in a game devised by prison authorities as a diversion to stop inmates betting on Euro 2004. Sounds a perverse strategy to us. Wouldn't it be more fun to bet on whether your cell mate is going to get crushed by Jumbo rather than a match in faraway Portugal? We'd also like to know whether the prospective Thai owners of Liverpool FC are thinking of bringing some big-eared pals over to Anfield for a pre-season training match. As for those prisoners, they can get back to the betting today, as Wayne Rooney and Co take on Croatia. Let's hope that England's own baby elephant has something to blow his trumpet about by the final whistle.