Letter: One mother's story: an exception that ignores adoption practice

MY WIFE had a child that was adopted before I married her. I knew about the child but it made no difference to my intention to marry her. Two years ago, in his early twenties, he made contact with my wife. Six months later he left his wife and came to live with us. The relationship between my wife and her son is extremely intense. Their conduct is more like two lovers than mother and son.

Finally after many years of marriage I felt compelled to leave my home and three children. The Post Adoption Counselling Service told me that this sequence of events is not at all unusual. These relationships are intense and exclude everyone else. They can be sexual in nature and are often incestuous.

It is tragic that the consequences of what should be a joyous event are so often destructive.

Name and address supplied