Middle Class Problems: From smartphones to train-ticket machines, I've struggled with technology

Robert Epstein has compiled a list of the sort of tech any right-thinking member of middle-classness has chanced upon and been defeated by

(Corbis)

I'm making no bones about it: this is basically just a list of technology I've struggled with over the years. The sort of tech any right-thinking member of middle-classness has chanced upon and been defeated by.

Tech problem No 1: the mobile phone. Or, rather, the smartphone. I was a latecomer to mobile technology, convinced that the only reason I'd need one would be if a person I was to meet needed to change plans. I thought this rude. If you make plans, you should carry them through. This meant I was the only person still using phone boxes as the once-10p toll rose ever upward. Nowadays my difficulty comes in corralling the thing; the last time I tried to connect it to my computer it made me think I'd lost five months of pictures of my baby, resulting in tears of frustration, upset and finally relief as I discovered they were all still there, somewhere (my wife found them for me).

Tech problem No 2: the train-ticket machine. Day return or super saver? Does anyone know?

Tech problem No 3: what to do with all my videos and cassette tapes. I don't even have anything to play them on any more.

Tech problem No 4: the heart-rate monitor on the treadmill at the gym. Hands are always too sweaty to keep them holding on for long enough.

Tech problem No 5: TV. Too much choice, which means no choice at all but to keep on swiping like you're on Tinder.

Tech problem No 6: the internet. Because on paper, this list is finite, whereas online, it could just keep going and…