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After my daughter passed away, we donated her organs – this is why

Jemima was 13 when she died so hadn't experienced big landmarks – GCSEs, first love, graduation, marriage. But for us it's incredibly comforting that she still lives on in others

Sophy Layzell
Thursday 05 October 2017 18:33 BST
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Born bang on her due date Jemima's arrival wasn't planned, but then neither was her death
Born bang on her due date Jemima's arrival wasn't planned, but then neither was her death (PA)

Theresa May’s announcement that the UK organ donation policy will soon be operating on a presumed consent basis is fantastic news and a beam of hope for us all. This means it's even more important to discuss your wishes with your loved ones for what you don't want.

My husband Harvey and I were lucky that we had, by complete chance, discussed this with our daughter Jemima shortly before her death. At first she was shocked and disgusted by the concept, but she understood the importance of organ donation and said that if ever it came to it she would donate. We never imagined we would have to honour her decision so soon.

Born bang on her due date, Jemima's arrival wasn't planned but then neither was her death. She collapsed in March 2012 following a burst aneurysm on the left side of her brain which despite remarkable hospital care she never recovered from. Guided through the process by the organ donation team we then agreed for all her main organs to be harvested, her corneas and liver stem cells to be gathered.

We were extremely proud to learn recently that she holds the record for the most number of recipients.

Her arrival in our life meant that for the first time I was able to look at someone and see similar features reflected back at me. She was my first blood relation. I had been adopted as a baby into a wonderful family but instantly felt this deep connection to this tiny mini me. This made her death particularly hard, as we shared the same interests and an enormous amount of energy went into helping her navigate life.

This energy now goes into her Trust, which helps raise awareness for organ donation, and helps young people with brain injuries by providing and paying for specialist equipment. Our annual creative writing competition encourages children to explore and discuss organ donation and invites them to submit an A4 piece under a relevant theme. The shortlist is judged by our patron, Michael Morpurgo.

Carrying out her wishes to donate her organs after her death was incredibly tough. Even though we knew her wishes, it still felt very hard to say yes. Your instinct is to preserve and protect your child. But it’s a decision we become more glad of everyday.

Labour conference: Corbyn announces promise to change organ donation law to a standing ovation

She was 13 when she died so hadn't experienced those big landmarks – GCSEs, learning to drive, first love, graduation, marriage. But for us it's incredibly comforting that she still lives on in others. Her life was not in vain. She gave hope and new memories to 11 families and the ripple effect of that is an incredible legacy.

It's not easy when you are facing your child's mortality head on and the question of organ donation comes up, but I would urge every parent to have a chat now, while you can, not just about organ donation but death in general. By facing it and discussing it we can take the fear away, and by knowing your loved ones wishes, any hesitation and doubt can be dispelled.

Life is so precious and it's wonderful to know that hope for many people on the transplant list is just around the corner.

Sophy Layzell runs the Jemima Layzell Trust which helps children with brain injuries. She donated her fee for this piece to the charity

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