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You try to arrive at the truth by telling a pack of lies if you are writing fiction, as opposed to trying to arrive at a pack of lies by telling the truth if you are a journalist - Melvin Burgess, author, winner of the Carnegie Medal for children's fiction with `Junk', his book about teenage drug addiction

I can claim to have been present at the precise moment when Prime Minister John Major went completely off his trolley - Kelvin MacKenzie, former editor of `The Sun', who was called into Downing Street over a complaint that his paper had reported the Premier's hair was turning white

The trouble is that when one is politically invulnerable, that is when carelessness wallops you over the back of the head with a large wet bloater - Jerry Hayes, former Tory MP

For Charles and Camilla to be remarried in church would mean the complete collapse of any marriage discipline and chaos in its attitude to the behaviour of its clergy. How could the Church seem to condone adultery by a prince and condemn it among lesser people? - Dr George Austin, Archdeacon of York

I am not interruptive and partisan. I am never bloody-well rude - John Humphrys, broadcaster

Our music is painfully, insufferably earnest - Bono of U2, rock star