I’m off to university, but fear another lockdown could destroy my mental health

I’m anxious about leaving my support bubble and potentially being completely isolated if the UK doesn’t return to normal

Half of students reported their mental health was worse than before the pandemic. (Getty Images)

After taking a year away from education, I’m itching to begin my postgraduate degree – I accepted the formal offer just a few days ago.

I’d always intended to have a gap year of sorts between my undergraduate degree and master’s, but before the pandemic, I had a different idea of what my year away from education would entail.

I’ve been freelancing remotely during my break from education, and pre-Covid-19 I envisaged travelling around the UK to catch up with university friends, taking the occasional cheap city break to Europe, and being free from the pressures of academic deadlines.

Instead, I found myself stuck in my flat alone, working from a desk in my living room, with the country going through various lockdowns, tiers and restrictions.

Like many of us, my mental health has been affected by the pandemic; I struggle being stuck at home, but luckily I’m in a support bubble with my parents and have been spending a lot of time at theirs, just to keep sane.

I started taking antidepressants in the summer of 2018 – between my first and second years of uni – and I’ve been on them ever since.

When I’m on my own, my mental health deteriorates, causing me to slip into bad habits. My sleeping pattern goes out of the window, I trade proper meals for snacks and takeaways, and I while away the hours scrolling through Netflix, letting the dishes and mugs pile up around me. When I’m paying for a degree, it’s paramount that I practice self-care and keep focused.

Looking after my mental health at university has always been a delicate balancing act. There’s so much pressure to keep on top of work, stay healthy, keep up a social life, get enough sleep and fit in a part-time job too.

I can’t help but view my return to education as some kind of return to normality, but there’s still so much uncertainty. A “what if?” lingers at the back of my mind, prompted by the government’s announcement that furlough will continue until September. 

With everything still up in the air, I’ve got no idea what to do about accommodation. I will be moving to Wales in September, but where, and with whom, do I live? I’m fortunate that I got through the majority of my undergraduate degree before our lives were turned upside down. As an undergraduate, I got to experience all the joys of university halls, private halls and a student house, living with three to nine other people at any one time. However, I’m not sure which road to go down this time. Part of me sees the appeal in living alone during my master’s, as I’ll be needing to knuckle down with minimal distraction, but if there is another lockdown, I could be in trouble – stuck on my own, isolated, with no support bubble.

After seeing how universities have been disrupted by the pandemic, I’m deeply thankful I delayed postgraduate study for a year, but there’s no guarantee this year will be normal. Student mental health has suffered due to the pandemic; in research conducted by the National Union of Students, it was found that half of the 4,000 students surveyed said their mental health was worse than before the pandemic, with loneliness having a huge impact.

We’re on the brink of a serious mental health crisis, and it’s vital that students have a support system. Universities can play a part here by helping students who might be isolated to form support bubbles and continuing to offer counselling services, but the government has a responsibility to put national plans in place for university students too.

As excited as I am to get started on improving myself, there’s so much uncertainty. I’m not the only returning student feeling anxious, we are keeping our fingers crossed that no matter where we live, we’ll be able to have a typical university experience. My mental health has fluctuated over the last few years, but going back to university this year could be my biggest challenge yet.