Eurovision 2016: Graham Norton's funniest quotes

Taking over from Sir Terry Wogan in 2008 was no mean feat but Norton has proved a worthy sardonic successor

Jess Denham
Saturday 14 May 2016 19:52
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Millions of Eurovision fans around the world might be tuning in for their genuine love of cheesy pop music and literal tons of glitter. Others of us sack off our Saturday nights out solely for Graham Norton's gloriously acerbic, oh-so-British commentary. His savage efforts this year have certainly not disappointed. Here are just a handful of our favourites:

Follow live for all the overly dramatic action from Stockholm

On the Netherlands' folk-pop act Douwe Bob backing themselves a little too strongly:

"He's put 1000 euros on himself to win, I hope he doesn't need that for tattoo laser removal."

On Hungarian act Freddie maybe not being destined for a pop career:

"If it doesn't work out for him, he's always got his Hotel Management degree. I feel he's going to use it."

On Italy's far too arty staging:

"It's incomprehensible. Something about the 'Tree of Life'. I did read a press release. That I didn't understand."

On Israel's dramatic Hovi Star mixing pyrotechnics with hair products:

"Well, that was tense. That number of fireworks with that amount of hairspray? Never a good idea."

On the eccentrically-dressed Jamie-Lee, singing "Ghost" for Germany:

"Maybe I'm just old and grumpy but there isn't a single thing about this woman that doesn't annoy me. Here's Jamie-Lee, making Bjork seem great."


On the introduction of Poland singer Michal Szpak:

"Enjoy that smile, it's the last one you'll see from him. He doesn't seem to enjoy performing very much."

On host Petra Mede excitedly telling everyone that there are still 14 songs to go:

"She says that as if it's a good thing!"

On this year's rockiest act, Minus One from Cyprus:

"The band is called Minus One but frankly should be called Minus Five. Might be better. The band performs in cages. I'm not sure who is being protected - them or the audience."

On Serbia's creepy choreogrphy:

"There's a strange backing dancer. It's more like lurking than choreography, but he is meant to be there."

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