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Mother reveals the controversial reason she refuses to throw her children birthday parties

‘Your poor kid. Why rob them of childhood birthday parties? It’s not about YOU,’ says commenter

Brittany Miller
New York
Thursday 22 February 2024 18:19 GMT
Related: Mother sparks debate after saying all her children go to birthday party if one is invited

Birthday parties are a well-known childhood memory, but one mother has decided not to throw her child any.

Marissa Light recently made a TikTok to explain why she made the decision to not throw her child’s yearly birthday parties. “Under no circumstances will I be throwing my daughter a birthday party every single year,” her video began.

“Here’s the deal: She is getting a first birthday party, she is getting a Sweet 16 and she is getting a graduation party following her March birthday. Other than that, she is not getting any more birthday parties.”

The mother continued to explain her reasoning, mentioning how not everyone might enjoy a child’s birthday party.

“Now, I have been to many children’s birthday partie,s whether they were three... seven... 12... and I’m sorry, but as someone who did not have a kid at the time, they were not enjoyable,” she said. “And I don’t even think the kid noticed that I was there. I am not going to force that on my friends and family.

“Now look, if you are someone who genuinely enjoys throwing your child a birthday party, pop off, Queen. Do what you want to do. I’m not telling anyone else how to live their lives. I just personally don’t find it necessary, and I’m not going to be doing it.”

As for her 11-month old daughter, Daisy, she only plans on celebrating her birthday with extended family along with dinner and cake.

On her birthday, she will also be creating a “Daisy Day” which is when her daughter can plan out the entire day doing whatever she wants. If she ever does want a physical birthday party, she would forfeit the “Daisy Day” for that year.

“And again, if you like to throw yearly parties, throw yearly parties,” she said in the video.

“I’m just saying as someone who has been to a lot of them and kind of felt obligated to be at them, I’m just not going to be doing it – it’s a lot of stress on my part to organise and plan and put on the party and I’m not going to be doing that to my friends who don’t even have children, my family who, their children will be older. I just don’t want a bunch of people sitting around at my house all day.”

After posting many people turned to the comments appearing split on whether or not it was a good idea to make this decision.

Some commenters were appalled to see birthday parties being taken away.

“Your poor kid. Why rob them of childhood birthday parties? It’s not about YOU, it’s about THEM. Yuck,” one commenter wrote.

Another commenter agreed, writing, “The kid who doesn’t have parties... usually becomes the same kid that other parents don’t think to invite at all.”

“Everyone deserves a birthday party every year. Even a small one with a few of their besties,” a third person argued in the comments.

Other commenters didn’t have a problem with Light’s birthday party arrangement, pointing out that every kid might not want a birthday party.

“An introverted kid will love this. Just make sure that you’re celebrating that kid the way they’d like. Not the way you want to celebrate them,” one comment read.

“As a formerly anxious kid, the pressure of ‘performing’ at a birthday was stressful,” another commenter pointed out.

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