") no-repeat center center;background-size:10px 16px;content:' '}@media(min-width:768px){.egqDdf::before{display:none}}.hzcAyL{min-height:389px;margin-bottom:16px;clear:both}@media(min-width:1000px){.hzcAyL{min-height:380px}}.cVPRNn{aspect-ratio:16/9}.fGzMFb{width:100%;box-sizing:border-box}@media(min-width:768px){.fGzMFb{max-width:634px}}@media(min-width:1250px){.fGzMFb{max-width:622px}}.hHATii{display:flex;width:auto;box-sizing:border-box;align-items:center;justify-content:flex-start;gap:4px;color:#ec1a2e;color:light-dark(#ec1a2e,#ec1a2e)}.frlkrE{display:block;font:bold 14px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif;text-decoration-line:underline;margin-block:0;text-align:center}.gFogGN{display:inline-flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center;gap:4px}.gFogGN:hover .sc-aja53j-2,.gFogGN:hover .sc-a5wy94-0{color:#ac2a2c;color:light-dark(#ac2a2c,#f58992)}.cDGSNR{font:normal 16px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}.eSVQSf{display:flex;position:relative;overflow:hidden;width:auto;height:40px;flex-direction:column;order:-1;gap:8px;opacity:1;transition:all .5s ease-in-out;transition-behavior:allow-discrete}.eSVQSf::after{--fade-from:rgba(255,255,255,0);--fade-mid:rgba(255,255,255,0.5);--fade-to:#fff;position:absolute;bottom:0;left:0;z-index:1;width:100%;height:40px;background-image:linear-gradient(to bottom,var(--fade-from) 0,var(--fade-mid) 50%,var(--fade-to) 100%);content:'';opacity:1;pointer-events:none;transition:opacity 150ms ease-out}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.eSVQSf::after{--fade-from:light-dark(rgba(255,255,255,0),rgba(0,0,0,0))}}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.eSVQSf::after{--fade-mid:light-dark(rgba(255,255,255,0.5),rgba(0,0,0,0.5))}}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.eSVQSf::after{--fade-to:light-dark(#fff,#000)}}@media(min-width:768px){.fiXggt{order:-1}}@media(min-width:768px){.jikgMc{display:flex;position:relative;align-items:flex-start;margin-top:12px}}@media(min-width:1000px){.iZGsHB .taboola{display:none}}.iZGsHB:has(#taboola-carousel-thumbnails){min-height:426px}.iZGsHB:has(#taboola-mid-article-thumbnails-crime){min-height:405px}@media(min-width:1000px){.iZGsHB:has(#taboola-carousel-thumbnails),.iZGsHB:has(#taboola-mid-article-thumbnails-crime){min-height:0}}.fLVhoJ .tp-container-inner,.fLVhoJ .sc-1suqprf-0{position:relative;box-shadow:0 -22px 16px 22px rgba(255,255,255,0.95);box-shadow:0 -22px 16px 22px light-dark(rgba(255,255,255,0.95),rgba(0,0,0,0.95))}.fLVhoJ.closed{display:none}.hVIqlZ{width:32px}.hVIqlZ,.hVIqlZ:focus{color:#627aac;color:light-dark(#627aac,#627aac)}.hVIqlZ:hover,.hVIqlZ:active,.hVIqlZ:focus-visible{color:#9cabcb;color:light-dark(#9cabcb,#9cabcb)}@media(min-width:768px){.hVIqlZ.mobile-only{display:none}}.bnFTrl{width:32px}.bnFTrl,.bnFTrl:focus{color:#4e4e4e;color:light-dark(#4e4e4e,#4e4e4e)}.bnFTrl:hover,.bnFTrl:active,.bnFTrl:focus-visible{color:#919191;color:light-dark(#919191,#919191)}@media(min-width:768px){.bnFTrl.mobile-only{display:none}}.dtuElZ{width:32px}.dtuElZ,.dtuElZ:focus{color:#25d366;color:light-dark(#25d366,#25d366)}.dtuElZ:hover,.dtuElZ:active,.dtuElZ:focus-visible{color:#66e093;color:light-dark(#66e093,#66e093)}@media(min-width:768px){.dtuElZ.mobile-only{display:none}}.geQZNt{width:32px}.geQZNt,.geQZNt:focus{color:#ec1a2e;color:light-dark(#ec1a2e,#ec1a2e)}.geQZNt:hover,.geQZNt:active,.geQZNt:focus-visible{color:#f58992;color:light-dark(#f58992,#f58992)}@media(min-width:768px){.geQZNt.mobile-only{display:none}}.fMVKDn{display:flex;gap:12px}.kHbRaW .sc-17yxc4y-0{display:none}.kHbRaW:hover .sc-17yxc4y-0,.kHbRaW.bookmark-button-saved .sc-17yxc4y-0{display:block}.kHbRaW:hover .sc-17yxc4y-1,.kHbRaW.bookmark-button-saved .sc-17yxc4y-1{display:none}.kHbRaW.bookmark-button-saved .sc-17yxc4y-0{display:block}.kHbRaW.bookmark-button-saved .sc-17yxc4y-1{display:none}.kHbRaW.bookmark-button-saved:hover .sc-17yxc4y-0{display:none}.kHbRaW.bookmark-button-saved:hover .sc-17yxc4y-1{display:block}.LrqJk{display:inline-block;width:32px;height:32px;color:#70a5a7;color:light-dark(#70a5a7,#70a5a7)}.gsHIni{display:flex;flex-direction:row;justify-content:center;gap:12px}.jTEZjg{display:flex;position:relative;justify-content:center}@media(min-width:768px){.jTEZjg{justify-content:flex-end;padding-top:12px;margin:0}}.laxBOB{display:flex}.sticky .laxBOB{flex-direction:column}.hDXmfN{overflow:hidden;height:23px;margin-bottom:8px;border-bottom:0;clear:both}@media(min-width:768px){.hDXmfN{height:25px}}.jGyHqZ{display:inline-block;flex-shrink:0;margin:0 12px 0 0;font:bold 14px/normal 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}.jGyHqZ::after{content:':'}.bsdbXr{display:inline-block;margin-right:12px;margin-bottom:4px;color:#222;color:light-dark(#222,#fff);font:normal 14px/1.29 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif;text-decoration:underline}.bsdbXr::first-letter {text-transform:capitalize}@media(min-width:1000px){.subscribed .eWQiqu{margin-top:-184px}.article-feature:not(.article-feature-video) .subscribed .eWQiqu{margin-top:-407px}}.eWQiqu>p{margin:16px 0}.article-premium .eWQiqu>p{line-height:27px}.eWQiqu>h2{font-size:21px}.article-climate .eWQiqu>h2{color:#ec1a2e;color:light-dark(#ec1a2e,#ec1a2e)}.article-sgi .eWQiqu>h2{color:#ec1a2e;color:light-dark(#ec1a2e,#ec1a2e)}.eWQiqu>p:first-child{margin-top:0}.eWQiqu span:first-child~p:first-of-type{margin-top:0}.gCqUwG{display:flex;position:relative;max-width:100%;min-height:600px;justify-content:center;margin:0 auto;background-color:transparent;clear:both}@media(min-width:1000px){.gCqUwG{min-height:450px}}.teads .gCqUwG{display:block}.gCqUwG [data-mpu]{position:sticky;top:16px}.cGmNxG{overflow:hidden;width:100%;box-sizing:border-box;margin-bottom:16px}@media(min-width:768px){.cGmNxG{max-width:634px}}@media(min-width:1250px){.cGmNxG{max-width:622px}}.iqSitv{width:100%;box-sizing:border-box;padding:8px 12px 12px;border-top:8px solid #ec1a2e;border-top:8px solid light-dark(#ec1a2e,#ec1a2e);background-color:#fde8ea;background-color:light-dark(#fde8ea,#66000a)}@media(min-width:768px){.iqSitv{padding-top:4px;padding-bottom:12px}}.dlmCG{font:bold 22px/26px 'Indy Serif','Indy Serif Fallback',serif;margin:0 0 12px;text-align:center}@media(min-width:768px){.dlmCG{font:bold 30px/34px 'Indy Serif','Indy Serif Fallback',serif;letter-spacing:-0.048px;margin-bottom:12px;text-align:left}}.JMagJ{display:block;margin-bottom:12px}@media(min-width:768px){.JMagJ{display:none}}.eRfgdl{display:flex;width:100%;box-sizing:border-box;align-items:center;justify-content:center;gap:4px;background-color:#fde8ea;background-color:light-dark(#fde8ea,#66000a);color:#ec1a2e;color:light-dark(#ec1a2e,#ec1a2e)}@media(min-width:768px){.eRfgdl{width:auto;justify-content:flex-start}}.icmspM{display:block;font:bold 14px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif;text-decoration-line:underline;margin-block:0;text-align:center}.jEzKon{display:inline-flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center;gap:4px}.jEzKon:hover .sc-hez36s-5,.jEzKon:hover .sc-a5wy94-0{color:#ac2a2c;color:light-dark(#ac2a2c,#f58992)}.kxbAkl{font:normal 16px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}.igdyzJ{display:flex;width:100%;flex-direction:column}@media(min-width:768px){.igdyzJ{display:flow-root;gap:24px;transition:margin-bottom .3s ease-in-out}}.jDeUSg{display:flex;width:100%;flex-direction:column;align-items:center;justify-content:center}@media(min-width:768px){.jDeUSg{position:relative;z-index:1;width:212px;flex-shrink:0;justify-content:flex-start;margin-left:24px;float:right}}.bBLSBr{display:none;flex-direction:row;align-items:center;justify-content:center;gap:8px;margin-top:8px}@media(min-width:768px){.bBLSBr{display:flex;margin-top:12px}}.DIgLQ{display:flex;width:100%;align-items:center;justify-content:center;gap:8px;margin-top:8px;margin-bottom:12px}@media(min-width:768px){.DIgLQ{display:none}}@media(min-width:768px){.cPkZJS{order:-1}}.fJelbS .sc-aja53j-5::after{--fade-from:rgba(253,232,234,0);--fade-mid:rgba(253,232,234,0.5);--fade-to:#fde8ea}@media(min-width:360px){.fJelbS .sc-aja53j-5 .sc-aja53j-7{display:none}}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.fJelbS .sc-aja53j-5::after{--fade-from:light-dark(rgba(253,232,234,0),rgba(102,0,10,0))}}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.fJelbS .sc-aja53j-5::after{--fade-mid:light-dark(rgba(253,232,234,0.5),rgba(102,0,10,0.5))}}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.fJelbS .sc-aja53j-5::after{--fade-to:light-dark(#fde8ea,#66000a)}}.kGYWZt{margin:0 0 24px;font:normal 16px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}.eXohla{font:bold 16px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}.bXaOEb{display:flex;min-height:600px;justify-content:center}@media(min-width:1000px){.bXaOEb{min-height:450px}}.dlrgtE{min-height:600px}@media(min-width:1000px){.dlrgtE{min-height:450px}}.dlrgtE.mobile-only{display:block}@media(min-width:1000px){.dlrgtE.mobile-only{display:none}}.dlrgtE.desktop-only{display:none}@media(min-width:1000px){.dlrgtE.desktop-only{display:block;margin-bottom:16px}}.dlrgtE.desktop-only+p{margin-top:0}.dlrgtE .third-party-ad{position:sticky;top:16px}.fhuRbW{width:100%;flex-grow:1}.fhuRbW .social-share{width:100%;padding-top:10px;padding-bottom:20px}@media(min-width:768px){.fhuRbW .social-share{justify-content:flex-start}}.fhuRbW .social-share.sticky{display:none}@media(min-width:1000px){.fhuRbW .social-share.sticky{display:flex;position:sticky;top:14px;width:34px;flex-direction:column;padding-top:0;margin-top:0;margin-left:-25%}.fhuRbW .social-share.sticky .sc-mgcah7-0{margin:0 0 16px}.article-feature-video .fhuRbW .social-share.sticky{margin-top:0}.article-feature:not(.article-feature-video) .fhuRbW .social-share.sticky{margin-top:35%}}.fhuRbW.sponsored-article img,.fhuRbW.sponsored-article video{width:100%;max-width:602px;height:auto}.fhuRbW.sponsored-article iframe{max-width:602px;max-height:400px}.fhuRbW .under-article-prompt-donations{padding-bottom:8px;margin-top:-3px}.fhuRbW .big-letter{--color:#222;display:flex;position:relative;width:0;height:0;align-items:center;justify-content:center;padding:40px;margin-top:22px;margin-right:12px;border:1px solid var(--color);float:left;font:normal 52px/1 'Indy Serif','Indy Serif Fallback',serif;text-transform:uppercase}.fhuRbW .big-letter:first-child{margin-top:6px}.fhuRbW .big-letter::before{position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;box-sizing:border-box;border:1px solid var(--color);border-radius:50%;content:''}.fhuRbW #taboola-below-article-1{min-height:2350px}@media(min-width:768px){.fhuRbW #taboola-below-article-1{min-height:3370px}}.fhuRbW #taboola-below-article-1-split-num-1{min-height:130px}@media(min-width:768px){.fhuRbW #taboola-below-article-1-split-num-1{min-height:415px}}.fhuRbW .sc-fwko30-0+.sc-1xtsh2b-0{margin-top:-16px}@media(min-width:768px){.fhuRbW{max-width:636px;margin:0}}@media(min-width:1000px){.fhuRbW{max-width:624px;margin:0}.fhuRbW.subscribed{max-width:636px}}@media(max-width:999px){.fhuRbW{padding-right:0}.fhuRbW .under-article-prompt-donations{margin-top:-18px}}.fhuRbW .anchor-nav-header{scroll-margin-top:79px}.fhuRbW .anchor-nav-header a{color:#222;color:light-dark(#222,#fff)}.fhuRbW .anchor-nav-header a:hover{color:#222;color:light-dark(#222,#fff)}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.fhuRbW .big-letter{--color:light-dark(#222,#fff)}}.cWTNvs{display:flex;flex-wrap:wrap;justify-content:flex-start;margin-bottom:8px;color:#fff;color:light-dark(#fff,#bdbdbd);font:normal 16px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}@media(min-width:768px){.cWTNvs{width:70%;align-items:center;justify-content:flex-start;margin-bottom:0;font:normal 16px/24px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}}@media(min-width:1000px){.cWTNvs{width:70%;margin-bottom:0}}.hWBwna{display:flex;height:20px;margin:0 12px 8px 0}.article-voices .hWBwna{height:auto}@media(min-width:425px){.article-voices .hWBwna{height:20px}}.hWBwna::before{display:inline-block;align-self:center;margin-top:1px;margin-right:12px;content:'\2022';transform:scale(1.5)}.hWBwna:first-child::before{content:none}@media(min-width:768px){.hWBwna{height:24px;margin-bottom:0}.hWBwna::before{margin-top:2px}}.hWBwna time{display:block}.hWBwna time::first-letter {text-transform:capitalize}.iJtxXk{display:inline-block;margin:0 12px 8px 0;color:#ef4757;color:light-dark(#ef4757,#ec1a2e);font:bold 16px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif;letter-spacing:-0.5px}.iJtxXk:hover,.iJtxXk:active{color:#f58992;color:light-dark(#f58992,#ac2a2c)}@media(min-width:768px){.iJtxXk{margin-bottom:0}}.pYMAz{margin:0 12px 8px -8px}@media(min-width:768px){.pYMAz{margin-bottom:0}}.euvwNP{margin:0 4px 8px 0}.euvwNP::before{display:inline-block;margin-top:2px;margin-right:12px;color:#fff;color:light-dark(#fff,#bdbdbd);content:'\2022';transform:scale(1.5)}.euvwNP:first-child::before{display:none}@media(min-width:768px){.euvwNP{margin-bottom:0}}.fkbzZm{display:flex;justify-content:flex-start;padding:0;margin:0 0 16px}@media(min-width:768px){.fkbzZm{display:flex;width:30%;align-items:center;justify-content:flex-end;margin:0}}@media(min-width:1000px){.fkbzZm{width:30%}}.eTZxgZ{padding-top:0;border-top:0;border-bottom:0}@media(min-width:768px){.eTZxgZ{display:flex;flex-flow:row wrap;padding-bottom:16px}.eTZxgZ .sc-mzrbq8-0{order:1}.eTZxgZ .sc-mzrbq8-6{order:2}}@media(min-width:1000px){.eTZxgZ{flex-direction:row}}.bVKiLw{padding:16px 12px 12px;text-align:left;font:bold 14px/18px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}@media(min-width:768px){.bVKiLw{padding:16px 16px 12px}}.article-infact .bVKiLw{padding:16px 0}@media(min-width:1000px){.bVKiLw{padding:24px 0 19px}.article-feature .bVKiLw{max-width:968px;margin:0 auto}}.bVKiLw a{color:#fff;color:light-dark(#fff,#fff)}.bVKiLw a:hover{color:#f58992;color:light-dark(#f58992,#f58992)}.bVKiLw a:hover::after{color:#fff;color:light-dark(#fff,#fff)}.bVKiLw a::after{margin-right:4px;margin-left:4px;content:'>'}.bVKiLw a:last-child::after{display:none}.hMldFc{margin:0 0 20px;letter-spacing:0}.cFDphy{margin:0;color:#fff;color:light-dark(#fff,#bdbdbd);font:normal 16px/20px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}@media(min-width:768px){.cFDphy{font:normal 18px/22px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}}@media(min-width:1000px){.cFDphy{font:normal 20px/24px 'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif}}.cFDphy p{font:inherit}.article-feature .cFDphy a{font-weight:bold}.gHvZoJ{max-width:968px;margin:0 auto;background:#222;background:light-dark(#222,#000)}@media(min-width:1000px){.gHvZoJ{padding:0 16px}.parallax .gHvZoJ{max-width:1240px}}.Rdknw{font:bold 32px/36px 'Indy Serif','Indy Serif Fallback',serif;letter-spacing:-0.0156em}@media(min-width:768px){.Rdknw{font:bold 44px/48px 'Indy Serif','Indy Serif Fallback',serif;letter-spacing:-0.0113em}}@media(min-width:1000px){.Rdknw{font:bold 54px/58px 'Indy Serif','Indy Serif Fallback',serif;letter-spacing:-0.0092em}}.cKuFPu{background:#222;background:light-dark(#222,#000)}.cKuFPu .sc-qvufca-1{max-width:968px;background:#222;background:light-dark(#222,#000)}.cKuFPu .sc-qvufca-0{margin:0}@media(max-width:999px){.cKuFPu .sc-qvufca-0{margin:0 12px 0}}.cKuFPu .sc-qvufca-2,.cKuFPu .sc-aeekvc-0{color:#fff;color:light-dark(#fff,#fff)}.cKuFPu .sc-qvufca-2{margin:0 0 20px}.cKuFPu .sc-aeekvc-0{margin-bottom:16px}.bpXajI{max-width:100%;clear:both}.iExVwO{overflow:hidden;height:0;color:transparent}.VkEbW{max-width:100%;margin:0 0 20px}.VkEbW.sticky{position:sticky;top:16px}.jpuEXf{min-height:600px}.jpuEXf #mpu1,.jpuEXf #sidebar1{position:sticky;top:16px}.bIVNVq{min-height:250px}.dcXsiQ{max-width:100%}.loNRDw{margin:0 0 6px;color:#646464;color:light-dark(#646464,#bdbdbd);font-family:'Indy Sans','Indy Sans Fallback',sans-serif;font-size:15px}.ezMsnK{margin:0 0 12px}.iIPWMQ{height:380px}.gXoWZo{width:100%;height:51px}.hjNIYD{margin-bottom:16px;border-bottom:1px solid #919191;border-bottom:1px solid light-dark(#919191,#646464)}.vzWDo{margin-bottom:16px}.vzWDo [role='listitem']{position:relative;margin-bottom:12px;border-bottom:1px solid #d3d3d3;border-bottom:1px solid light-dark(#d3d3d3,#919191)}.vzWDo [role='listitem'] .sc-u4n1j-0{display:flex;position:absolute;bottom:16px;left:10px;width:32px;height:32px;align-items:center;justify-content:center;border-radius:50%;background-color:#ec1a2e;background-color:light-dark(#ec1a2e,#ec1a2e)}.vzWDo [role='listitem'] .sc-u4n1j-0>svg{width:90%;fill:#fff;fill:light-dark(#fff,#000);stroke:transparent}.vzWDo [role='listitem']:first-child{display:block;padding-bottom:0;margin-bottom:12px}.vzWDo [role='listitem']:first-child .sc-u4n1j-0{top:-15px;bottom:auto;left:12px}.vzWDo [role='listitem']:first-child>*:first-child{display:block;width:100%;height:205px}.vzWDo [role='listitem']:first-child>*:last-child{--content-bg:#222;--content-bg-opaque:rgba(34,34,34,0.7);position:absolute;bottom:0;width:100%;padding:28px 12px 12px;background:linear-gradient(to top,var(--content-bg) 70%,var(--content-bg-opaque) 100%) no-repeat;color:#fff;color:light-dark(#fff,#222);font-size:17px;font-weight:bold}.vzWDo [role='listitem']:last-child{margin-bottom:0;border-bottom:0 none}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.vzWDo [role='listitem']:first-child>*:last-child{--content-bg:light-dark(#222,#000)}}@supports(color:light-dark(red,red)){.vzWDo [role='listitem']:first-child>*:last-child{--content-bg-opaque:light-dark(rgba(34,34,34,0.7),rgba(0,0,0,0.7))}}.clClJO{min-height:1924px}@media(max-width:767px){.clClJO{display:none}}.doEDPw{width:308px}.doEDPw.hidden{display:none}@media(max-width:999px){.doEDPw{display:none}}.article-liveblog .ebbjSB{background-color:#f7f7f7;background-color:light-dark(#f7f7f7,#222)}.ghFVC{justify-content:center}.clCHwE{justify-content:center}
Lifestyle People defend man who called fiancée ‘selfish’ over pregnancy announcement plan ‘Practically evil,’ one person said of woman’s plan
Related: Best man reveals he used to date bride during wedding speech Your support helps us to tell the story From reproductive rights to climate change to Big Tech, The Independent is on the ground when the story is developing. Whether it's investigating the financials of Elon Musk's pro-Trump PAC or producing our latest documentary, 'The A Word', which shines a light on the American women fighting for reproductive rights, we know how important it is to parse out the facts from the messaging.
At such a critical moment in US history, we need reporters on the ground. Your donation allows us to keep sending journalists to speak to both sides of the story.
The Independent is trusted by Americans across the entire political spectrum. And unlike many other quality news outlets, we choose not to lock Americans out of our reporting and analysis with paywalls. We believe quality journalism should be available to everyone, paid for by those who can afford it.
Your support makes all the difference. Read more People are defending a man who questioned whether he was wrong to call his fiancée “selfish” over her plan to announce her pregnancy at her cousin’s wedding .
In a post shared to the Reddit subreddit AITA [Am I the a**hole], the 31-year-old man, who goes by the username u/anonymousAITAH, revealed that he and his 29-year-old partner recently found out that they are expecting a child.
According to the Reddit user, he became concerned when his fiancée revealed that she planned to inform her family about the pregnancy at her cousin’s upcoming wedding, as he said that, in addition to taking away from their moment, the bride-to-be and her partner have been struggling to conceive themselves.
The OP [original poster] also revealed that his fiancée’s cousin had recently experienced a miscarriage, and that she and her partner had postponed their wedding as they grieved the loss.
“My fiancée mentioned that she wanted to wait to announce it at her cousin’s wedding, which will be taking place on Sunday,” he wrote. “Her cousin and her husband have been struggling getting pregnant even with IVF.
“Recently, they just got some news that their insurance has stopped funding IVF and not to mention the heartbreak of a recent miscarriage on Mother’s Day. They held off on the wedding.”
According to the man, because of what his partner’s cousin has been going through, he told his fiancée that it wasn’t a “good idea” to announce her pregnancy at the wedding.
“This just seemed so wrong, especially it being at their wedding,” he wrote, adding: “I asked if she was going to at least ask her cousin for permission and she said no because she wanted it to be a surprise for everyone.”
In addition to being insensitive, the man said he also encouraged his partner not to go through with her plan because it would take attention away from the newlyweds on the day of their wedding.
However, according to the Reddit user, his fiancée disagreed, as she claimed that the wedding would be the “perfect time” to share the pregnancy news “because it’s such a joy and it’s not like she can keep it away forever”. He said she also argued that her cousin’s struggles to get pregnant “shouldn’t keep her from [sharing] something so positive”.
“I told her that’s not the point, she knows what they’ve been through and she’s being selfish if she actually goes through with that,” he wrote, adding that she “cried” and claimed he wasn’t being “supportive”.
According to the man, his fiancée no longer wants him to come to the wedding.
In a follow-up edit made to the post, the man revealed that there has been some tension in his fiancée’s relationship with her cousin since they were children, as his partner “always saw competition in her cousin”.
The post, which has since been upvoted more than 7,000 times, has seen viewers overwhelmingly agree with the man’s suggestion that his fiancée is being “selfish”.
“Hijacking someone’s event to make your own announcement is extremely rude and selfish. Add on that the couple is having trouble getting pregnant themselves - it’s [10 times worse],” one person commented.
Another said: “She is being selfish. Not the time or place to announce a pregnancy.”
Others encouraged the man to warn the bride and groom ahead of their wedding of his fiancée’s plan.
“Give the cousin a call and let them know what’s up. Give them a chance to uninvite her. She will ruin the day for them if she’s not stopped. What a horrible, selfish person!” one comment reads, while someone else wrote: “The fact she won’t ask her cousin means she knows what she wants to do is wrong.
“Honestly at this point do you have any contact with her cousin/family? Would it be worth reaching out to try to warn them? Or maybe do some sort of preemptive party/announcement? Personally I’d view this as a huge red flag that your fiancée can’t comprehend having another occasion to announce this, and wants to ruin her cousin’s wedding day with this.”
According to Diane Gottsman , national etiquette expert and founder of The Protocol School of Texas, who spoke to Today , there are certain unspoken rules that all wedding guests should abide by, and they include not making “big announcements” at someone else’s wedding.
“Don’t trump the bride and groom with your own proposals, your own news. And certainly don’t give a toast and embarrass the bride and groom with details about other relationships,” Gottsman said.
The Independent has contacted u/anonymousAITAH for comment.
Thank you for registering Please refresh the page or navigate to another page on the site to be automatically logged in Please refresh your browser to be logged in
Join our commenting forum
Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies
Comments