Boris thought he was Caesar – now he’s just a guest at Caesar’s Palace

He doesn’t want to be waking up five thousand miles away from the mess of his own making. He wants to be right in the middle of it, rolling around, writes Tom Peck

The details, as ever, reduce the role of the satirist to that of typist (PA)

Could anyone have predicted that, eight months after leaving office, Boris Johnson would wake up in Vegas with the police wanting to know what he’s been up to?

Rumour has it that this latest knockout blow to his already entirely irredeemable reputation may have put him off his buffet hotel breakfast before repeating his one speech for his next six-figure payout.

The details, as ever, reduce the role of the satirist to that of typist. As is well known, Johnson refuses to admit that he misled the House of Commons first when he said that no parties took place in Downing Street during lockdowns, secondly when he said that yes actually they did but he didn’t know about them, and thirdly when he said he didn’t know about them but had actually attended them.