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'I'm good with a water cannon'

How We Met: Julian Ovenden & James D'Arcy

'Maybe one day we could be the English Matt Damon and Ben Affleck...'

Shamim Ahmed:

Shamim Ahmed Khan: Sitar player taught by Shankar

Shamim Ahmed Khan was one of the most eloquent sitar players of his generation and scion of a family of hereditary Hindustani classical musicians which upheld and advanced a gharana, meaning a school or style of music-making, historically generally associated with a specific geographical seat, in this case the Agra Gharana. Agra would figure largely in his musical destiny, and bring him to the attention of his life-long guru, Ravi Shankar.

Frank Carson's funeral is taking place today

'Ray of sunshine' Frank Carson remembered

Hundreds line the streets for comedian's funeral

The Leisure Society, Trafalgar Studios 2, London

Agyness Deyn sure knows how to wear a frock. It was, after all, in the large print of her separate metier as an ex-supermodel.

Lisa Markwell: Why is everything about school a competition?

Today is either a red-letter day or a world of pain for parents around the country with children in year six of primary school. For it is the day when they receive notification of which secondary school their child has got into.

Drowning Rose, By Marika Cobbold

Since her popular debut, Guppies for Tea, Swedish-born Marika Cobbold has established a reputation for astute and acerbic romances. Her previous novel, Aphrodite's Workshop for Reluctant Lovers, saw the goodness of love intervening in human affairs via the auspices of a relationship therapist. The heroine of her seventh novel, Eliza Cummings, could do with some one-to-one sessions herself.

Apology after coffin mix-up

A crematorium has apologised after a funeral service took place with the wrong coffin.

Pramface, BBC3, Thursday
Watson & Oliver, BBC2, Monday

OMG. Do we really need more jerking-off jokes, orgasm faces and drunk-schoolgirl pratfalls?

Prime Minister Julia Gillard and her foreign minister, Kevin Rudd, were once a 'dream team'

Julia Gillard challenges Kevin Rudd to fight Labor Party leadership contest

The Australian Prime Minister, Julia Gillard, has thrown down the gauntlet to Kevin Rudd, challenging him to fight her for the Labor Party leadership and top political office in a ballot next Monday.

Derf Backderf's 'My Friend Dahmer'

A graphic look at Jeffrey Dahmer's high-school life

Dark subject matter in graphic novels is nothing new – but a memoir about a childhood with serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer is up there with the darkest of them.

Mr Murdoch flew into London last week to reassure staff at The Sun following the arrest of five senior journalists over allegations of corrupt payments to public officials

Dominic Lawson: Murdoch's right about what sells papers

Read all about it! Lady says she arranged flights for Lord Lucan's children to be seen by their dad in Africa! The murdering aristocrat was secretly smuggled out of Britain by his toff friends! Ex-cop confirms: I spoke to man who says he spoke to other man who swears he saw Lucan in Africa!

Terence Blacker: No break-up without a bitter, public outpouring

Couples who, in a spirit of romance and hope, are beginning to prepare for a spring wedding would probably do well to avoid reading the press at the moment.

English National Ballet dancers perform The Nutcracker

Ballet establishment is rocked again another talent exits

British ballet is making a habit of mysterious departures. A month after rising star Sergei Polunin shocked the Royal Ballet by exiting stage left, for reasons that remain best known to himself, it emerged that the artistic director of the English National Ballet (ENB) is also set to leave, without giving any indication why.

DVD: Don't Be Afraid of the Dark, For retail & rental (Optimum)

Guy Pearce and Katie Holmes are renovating a gothic mansion when Pearce's young daughter spots the scuttling goblins which live in the basement.

New evidence Lord Lucan fled to Africa, says BBC documentary

The fugitive aristocrat Lord Lucan fled to Africa to lead a secret life after the murder of his children's nanny, according to a new BBC documentary to be aired tomorrow. The programme will reveal that his children were taken to Africa twice so he could see them, but he never met them.

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Barn owls are among species that could be affected
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After another poor series in Sri Lanka, Alastair Cook claimed all players go through a lean period
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food + drinkAuthor DBC Pierre presents his guide to the morning after
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Sarah Silverman (middle) with sister Reform Rabbi Susan Silverman (right) and sister actress Laura Silverman (left) at Jerusalem's Western Wall for feminist Hanuka candle-lighting ceremony
peopleControversial comedian stages pro-equality Hanukkah lighting during a protest at Jerusalem's Wailing Wall
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The Bach Choir has been crowned the inaugural winner of Sky Arts’ show The Great Culture Quiz
arts + ents140-year-old choir declared winner of Sky Arts' 'The Great Culture Quiz'
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Independent Travel
Burgundy, the River Rhone & Provence – Five-star MS Swiss Corona 7 nights from £999pp
Lake Como St Moritz & the Bernina Express 7 nights from £809pp
Vietnam
Lake Maggiore, Orta & the Matterhorn 7 nights from £939pp
South Africa
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Prices correct as of 19 December 2014
Homeless Veterans appeal: 'You look for someone who's an inspiration and try to be like them'

Homeless Veterans appeal

In 2010, Sgt Gary Jamieson stepped on an IED in Afghanistan and lost his legs and an arm. He reveals what, and who, helped him to make a remarkable recovery
Could cannabis oil reverse the effects of cancer?

Could cannabis oil reverse effects of cancer?

As a film following six patients receiving the controversial treatment is released, Kate Hilpern uncovers a very slippery issue
The Interview movie review: You can't see Seth Rogen and James Franco's Kim Jong Un assassination film, but you can read about it here

The Interview movie review

You can't see Seth Rogen and James Franco's Kim Jong Un assassination film, but you can read about it here
Serial mania has propelled podcasts into the cultural mainstream

How podcasts became mainstream

People have consumed gripping armchair investigation Serial with a relish typically reserved for box-set binges
Jesus Christ has become an unlikely pin-up for hipster marketing companies

Jesus Christ has become an unlikely pin-up

Kevin Lee Light, aka "Jesus", is the newest client of creative agency Mother while rival agency Anomaly has launched Sexy Jesus, depicting the Messiah in a series of Athena-style poses
Rosetta space mission voted most important scientific breakthrough of 2014

A memorable year for science – if not for mice

The most important scientific breakthroughs of 2014
Christmas cocktails to make you merry: From eggnog to Brown Betty and Rum Bumpo

Christmas cocktails to make you merry

Mulled wine is an essential seasonal treat. But now drinkers are rediscovering other traditional festive tipples. Angela Clutton raises a glass to Christmas cocktails
5 best activity trackers

Fitness technology: 5 best activity trackers

Up the ante in your regimen and change the habits of a lifetime with this wearable tech
Paul Scholes column: It's a little-known fact, but I have played one of the seven dwarves

Paul Scholes column

It's a little-known fact, but I have played one of the seven dwarves
Fifa's travelling circus once again steals limelight from real stars

Fifa's travelling circus once again steals limelight from real stars

Club World Cup kicked into the long grass by the continued farce surrounding Blatter, Garcia, Russia and Qatar
Frank Warren column: 2014 – boxing is back and winning new fans

Frank Warren: Boxing is back and winning new fans

2014 proves it's now one of sport's biggest hitters again
Jeb Bush vs Hillary Clinton: The power dynamics of the two first families

Jeb Bush vs Hillary Clinton

Karen Tumulty explores the power dynamics of the two first families
Stockholm is rivalling Silicon Valley with a hotbed of technology start-ups

Stockholm is rivalling Silicon Valley

The Swedish capital is home to two of the most popular video games in the world, as well as thousands of technology start-ups worth hundreds of millions of pounds – and it's all happened since 2009
Did Japanese workers really get their symbols mixed up and display Santa on a crucifix?

Crucified Santa: Urban myth refuses to die

The story goes that Japanese store workers created a life-size effigy of a smiling "Father Kurisumasu" attached to a facsimile of Our Lord's final instrument of torture
Jennifer Saunders and Kate Moss join David Walliams on set for TV adaptation of The Boy in the Dress

The Boy in the Dress: On set with the stars

Walliams' story about a boy who goes to school in a dress will be shown this Christmas