‘I thought about ending my life’: Cara Delevingne says internalised homophobia made her suicidal
‘I couldn’t talk to anyone about it,’ recalls the model as her new documentary airs in the UK on BBC Three and BBC iPlayer
Cara Delevingne has revealed how struggling with her gender identity when she was growing up left her feeling suicidal.
Speaking in her forthcoming BBC documentary Planet Sex with Cara Delevingne, the model and actor, who is gender fluid and bisexual, explained that she couldn’t understand her own identity as a teenager.
“I couldn’t talk to anyone about it,” she says on the documentary. “I had a lot of internalised homophobia and shame. I thought that I was abnormal.”
The 30-year-old continued: “I thought about ending my life, like I had multiple times, and I’m so glad I didn’t because if I can help any other kid that means the world to me.
“It means the world to that little queer kid I was. Or I am.”
Reflecting on the making of the six-part documentary, which premieres in the UK on BBC Three and BBC iPlayer on Thursday 1 December, Delevingne told The BBC: “It has very much changed my life. Now I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I feel really, really proud of what we created.
“I know I shouldn’t feel shame but I truly believe there are souls like me all over the world.”
She added: “I think this opened me up into being ready for it.”
Delevingne explained that she hopes the documentary will open people’s eyes to the reality of questioning your gender identity and help others doing the same feel less alone.
“In the world that I live in, most of my friends are straight,” she said. “I’d never been to Pride before making this show. I have a lot more queer friends now.
“If we can change anyone’s minds to be more willing to accept themselves, or someone else, that’s all I want.”
For confidential 24/7 support in the UK, call Samaritans on 116 123 or visit a local Samaritans branch, see www.samaritans.org
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